Posts filed under ‘protect our kids’

12/14 Parenting

Psnlogo_gun control

I listened to the 60 Minutes interview of the Newtown parents and people who lost children and loved ones in the December 14th Sandy Hook Elementary massacre. The Newtown group has successfully lobbied for historic gun control legislation, which was signed into law by Connecticut’s Gov. Dannel Malloy last week. The group is now hoping the gun control legislation will be signed into law by the U.S. House of Representatives and Senate. It was a very difficult show to watch as the parents talked about how important the new legislation was, and while it wouldn’t protect their child who had been killed, it would (hopefully) save countless other lives. The parents that spoke out during the 60 Minutes interview were pretty ordinary, everyday parents like you and me. What was profound were words they used like “there seems to be a sense of complacency in this country” or “loving my child does not mean I give my child everything he wants”. There are many parents who have lost their children to gun violence, who were not privy to television interviews or continuous news coverage, yet the message is still the same. How do we protect our children from the dangers of senseless shootings? As one father said, better parenting has to take place. We can legislate gun control, but we can’t legislate sound parenting. At the risk of sounding judgmental, parents – be a parent, not your child’s friend. Are you living with an out of control teen or twenty-something?

Is your son or daughter running rampant, ignoring your rules, coming and going as they please? Do you need help parenting your kids? For help, contact me at: cgwillnot@comcast.net Will more restrictive legislation curb the gun violence? I don’t know, but I do know that doing nothing means we get more of the same, senseless KILLINGS!

C. Lynn Williams,
Author and Parenting Coach
#MsParentguru

Trying to Stay Sane While Raising Your Teen (St. Paul Press, 2010) tryingtostaysanewhileraisingyourteen
The Pampered Prince: Moms Create a GREAT Relationship with Your Son (St. Paul Press, 2012) TPP
How to Turn Your Princess Into a Queen – The Art of Raising an Awesome Daughter (available in late spring, 2013)

April 9, 2013 at 11:29 am 4 comments

Let’s Go Back to Parenting 101

My heart goes out to all of the parents who have lost children, no matter whether it was due to a serious illness, child custody, runaway, and suicide or gun violence. We are seeing troubled times these days, and a large part is probably due to a number of reasons, one being that people have lost their minds! Also in this wonderful, global society we live in, news is reported instantly overwhelming us with tragic news accounts throughout any given day.

Example of someone who has lost his mind: A person that kills a school bus driver, kidnaps an autistic kid and holds him hostage for unknown reasons. http://www.cnn.com/2013/02/05/us/alabama-child-hostage/index.html
Between situations like this and the random (and not so random) shootings that are killing our children at alarming rates, I recommend that we go back to Parenting 101!

Parenting 101 requires:
• That you know where your child is (and your child knows you have eyes watching him or her) at all times.
• Your child comes home directly after school lets out. If (s)he is involved in extracurricular activities, you arrange for your child to be picked up by a family member or trusted family friend
• You know most if not all of your child’s friends.
• You are friends with your neighbors and they have your permission to chastise your child when you are not around.
• Your child is at home, not out on the streets when the streetlights come on.

By the way, it’s also good to eat at least one meal together daily, so that you and your child can talk about the day’s events, possible issues at school with friends or bullies, and share time with each other. Just my parent thought.

C. Lynn Williams, #msparentguru
Author and Parenting Coach

Trying to Stay Sane While Raising Your Teen (St. Paul Press, 2010)
The Pampered Prince: Moms Create a GREAT Relationship with Your Son (St. Paul Press, 2012)

February 5, 2013 at 10:36 am 1 comment

Mothers – What’s Happening to Our Sons?

It’s been little more than a month since the Newtown shootings, and as a mother, I am still at a complete loss for how a son could kill his mother. I have two sons, my own and one I lovingly inherited when I married his father. I love them both and while I have had difficult conversations and tense moments with both sons, never in my wildest nightmares, would I imagine dying by their hand.

While we will never hear Nancy Lanza’s story about her relationship with her son Adam (the shooter), I came across an article where she cautioned one of her son’s babysitters to never turn his back on her son. Can you imagine living with a person and not being able to turn your back on him? http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-201_162-57559502/ex-babysitter-says-newtown-conn-school-shooter-adam-lanzas-mother-warned-dont-turn-your-back/
When we raise our sons, we pour so much love, attention, (hopefully) discipline, values and the kitchen sink into our boys, and yet many of them end up being killed, killing others, or going to prison. Mothers, where are we failing and why?

I also came across another article, where another mother lost her only son to gun violence and he was a good kid! We always think our sons are good kids! But this teen did what he was told; went to school every day (one of my requirements); obeyed his mother; and yet was randomly shot in the back after leaving a basketball game. http://my.chicagotribune.com/#section/544/article/p2p-74054502/

I’d like my sons to grow into wonderful men with families and great careers, like my dad and granddad. Is that too much to ask these days?

C. Lynn Williams
Author and Parenting Coach
#msparentguru

Trying to Stay Sane While Raising Your Teen (St. Paul Press, 2010)
The Pampered Prince: Moms Create a GREAT Relationship with Your Son (St. Paul Press, 2012)

January 19, 2013 at 1:03 pm Leave a comment

We Care…

These last two months have been tumultous months of chaos and violent events especially geared toward children and women. Just in the last two weeks, I have read about violence in Illinois, Colorado, Indiana and now Connecticut and China. I used to write that the violence that we are experiencing in our country is based on the breakdown of the family, lack of morals being taught in the home, or a lack of discipline. That is probably an easy answer. A more honest answer is that brutality and violence are common in TV shows, movies, comics, etc. and what way to look “cool” than to do the unconscionable – hurt someone! That may be a simplistic answer as well, so I’m not sure why there is such an attack on humanity, but the killings that are occurring in our homes, schools, businesses and communities is alarming to say the least!

What can we do as parents to shore up and protect our children from the chaos that is currently taking place in our world? There is no guarantee that you and your loved ones will be reunited at the end of the day. So here are my suggestions:
1. Love and hug your kids EVERYDAY!
2. Explain and communicate in a way that your child understands your care & concern for them!
3. Be concerned about other kids in your community as well, and
4. Support the teachers in your child’s life.

We are experiencing an enormous shift in how little we interact with each other and how easy it is to hide behind the technology that conveniences our lives. My son and daughter tell me they can always tell if a good television program is on. They can tell because I can hardly say two words together – I am distracted. Today is not a good time to be distracted from our children. We miss things they feel, think, say and do when we are distracted.

My heart goes out to the victims of domestic violence, dating violence, gun violence, and bullying.

CLW

December 15, 2012 at 10:42 pm 2 comments

Nurturing Young Kids

I was on my way to school and noticed a young man walking in front of a very young child, possibly a toddler. The “toddler” was hoping behind his dad and his dad was talking on the cell phone, oblivious to whether the child crossed the street safely or not. I was bothered by the entire scene, and I have seen this many times. The parent is in front of their child, and not paying attention to that child. What happened to walking down the street holding hands with your child? We were not allowed to cross the street without holding the hand of our older sibling or parent. What in the world are these people thinking about?

What are your thoughts?

March 22, 2012 at 2:16 am 2 comments

Punishing Autistic Children

Did you hear about this?

When Sandra Baker was called to pick up her 9-year-old autistic son, Chris, from his Mercer County, Kentucky school, she was stunned by what she found: She says that Chris’s teacher had stuffed him in a gym bag and left him in the hallway as punishment.
“When I walked in,” Sandra told CBS News, “I went down his hallway, and I saw this big green bag laying in the floor beside the [teacher’s] aide, and I saw it moving.”
Then Sandra heard a voice come from inside the bag:Momma, is that you?”
Sandra demanded her son be released immediately, but allegedly the bag was tied so tightly the teacher’s aide struggled to open it. When Chris finally got out, his mom says he was sweaty and uncommunicative.

Lydia Brown, a freshman at Georgetown University, is autistic, too. When she heard about Chris’s ordeal at school , she started a petition on Change.org demanding the Mercer County school district discipline the teacher who put Chris in the bag and require its teachers to complete training on interacting with autistic children. Click here to sign Lydia’s petition now.
At a meeting with school officials last week, Sandra learned this wasn’t the first time Chis had been stuffed in the duffel bag as punishment. The teachers allegedly referred to the duffel as a “therapy bag,” but lacking even basic training for working with autistic children, were unable to explain how confining Chris to a drawstring bag constituted “therapy” of any kind.

Here’s the worst part: after her meeting, Sandra says she rec eived no guarantee that this kind of abuse wouldn’t happen again — either to Chris or to other students in Mercer County schools.
That’s just not acceptable to Sandra, or to the 12,000 people who’ve already signed Lydia’s petition on Change.org. Lydia is hoping to deliver the petition to the Mercer County school board at their next meeting. The school board won’t be able to ignore this issue when they see the thousands of people angry about Chris’s treatment and calling for changes.
Please sign Lydia’s petition to get Mercer County schools to fire Chris’s teacher, and to get the school district to require its staff to complete comprehensive training on i nteracting with autistic children.

December 30, 2011 at 5:50 pm Leave a comment

Parenting and Moral Character

As I continue to hear unfolding stories about the Penn State coach, it seemed to take Penn State students (and mothers – up course) to rally around the victims before the country realized that that was the thing to do. There was a lot of remorse about the removal of the head coach and the university’s president, but as a mother and parent, I wanted more gnashing of teeth about how our moral decline prevented us from recognizing that crimes were perpetrated against young boys – boys who would be scarred for the rest of their life.

How do we effectively parent our children if our leaders and elected officials are more concerned with how something looks in our society versus sending morally correct messages to our children by removing people immediately from their position if they harm our children.

Just my two cents,
MsParentguru

November 17, 2011 at 6:26 pm Leave a comment

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