Posts filed under ‘support’
Is It Really Okay to Not Be Ok?
Many of us view success as pretty, handsome, moneyed, good job, well-liked…


Then when we don’t achieve success for any of the reasons listed below or more…
- Haven’t finished (or started) college
- Don’t have the right job
- Grew up in the wrong neighborhood
- Married… didn’t marry
- Wrong skin color, gender, religious belief
We wonder why we feel defeated, depressed, uninspired.
Or, we have “everything going for ourselves”, outwardly as my mom would say, and yet we feel defeated, depressed, or uninspired inside. Today in our How to ❤️ Love ❤️ Yourself More…Intentionally clubhouse, we talked about how being pretty and beautiful are NICE, but have nothing to do with how you feel inside. People are obsessed with looks and fortune. How can you be sad and depressed when you have good looks and wealth?
Easy!
As my co-moderator said, we are “cracked glass” and looking out we don’t see our external beauty and wealth. We only feel brokenness and sadness. Many of us live in quiet desperation and don’t know how to find our way out.
Suicide is not the answer.
I’ve lost several family members to suicide and while I don’t know exactly what each one felt before taking their life, I know what it feels to be the one left to pick up the pieces and try to figure out what happened? Each member had worth and value but did not feel that there was another way for their story to be told.
One of the best things you can do is open up and share your pain with a supportive friend, group, or a therapist. The other thing to do is remember, you are unique with a God-given purpose! Be who you want to be instead of a copy of someone else. Stop buying the “image” and be the original – one of a kind – amazing you!
Interested in loving yourself more deeply? Click Here – to schedule a complimentary chat with Ms. Parent Guru about how her How to Love Yourself In 30 Days coaching program can support you.
Click Here to become a part of her parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
I Heard Family…
Last week I watched the Democratic National Convention and Vice-President candidate Kamala Harris (D) spoke about how much she admired her mother and grandmother. She talked about kids going back to school whether in person or remotely and how important going to school was. She also talked about how challenging it is for parents and teachers during this time. There are so many questions to answer like what happens if I send my child to school and she gets the virus? Or what happens when I begin teaching my face-2-face classes and I catch the virus? As we head into the fall 2020 school year, these are questions that parents and teachers have.
Everytime Senator Harris spoke I heard family. The importance of family! Mothers! Fathers! Grandmothers! In many households, parents have chosen to homeschool. In other households, the parents have to leave home and their children are either going to school, or sitting in front of a computer screen and learning virtually. No matter which story is ours, we are concerned with keeping our children (and ourselves) safe from coronavirus.
When Senator Harris spoke of her mother, it reminded me of how much my mother supported me throughout my high school, college, grad school career.
Her support meant everything to me, even though (at times) I felt that she was overbearing and too
strict. When I didn’t understand a school topic, if she couldn’t explain it, she found someone that could. With her guidance, my dad’s, aunts, uncles and grandparents, I am here today able to talk with you about the importance of family support.
As Senator Harris said, getting ready this school year is challenging whether you are the parent or the teacher. But what I know is that our children are counting on us to learn and thrive. We can give them that whether we are college grads or high school dropouts. We may not have all (or even some) of the answers, but let’s start with the three points listed below. ⇓
Commit to these things:
- Your commitment to helping your child get online daily
- Asking your child questions to help him think critically
- Taking time to have fun. Play with your child and learn from him/her
- Be a good listener
- Be willing to learn new things
Know that this is an usual time, so have lots of teachable moments, fun, and learning something new times! Be patient with yourself, your situation and your children. Make memories that your children will talk about when they grow up.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons, Fathers and Daughters or Fathers and their Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
How Do You Protect Your Gang Connected Kid?
“I would talk to her, take her phone and try to keep her away from it, but it was hard,” said Brown, who believed her daughter was trying to protect herself from people who had targeted her. “You got to put up a tough front. I knew she was scared. She was scared all the time.”
My heart goes out to this mom as she explains what she did to protect her daughter from gang members, yet in the end, her daughter was still targeted and killed.
I’m reading this article in the Chicago Tribune and thinking about the influence that social media plays in the lives of our kids. Cell phones were important when my children were tweens and teens, but I would confiscate my older child’s phone at night or let her minutes run out. If the minutes ran out before the month was over, her phone didn’t work. Unfortunately there are many cell phone packages and providers, so paying for minutes is no longer an issue.
Kids now take to their social media pages to rant and emote (about pretty much everything). There is no difference between kids who are in or connected to gang members and social media and those who aren’t except for the retaliative violence that they tell their followers they are planning. If I lose a friend or family member to gun violence, I go on Twitter, Facebook or Snapchat and talk about what I plan to do. It’s a form of empowerment that gives our children a feeling of control and power.
The question is, as a parent, how do you manage this type of child? How do you keep them safe and help them feel empowered to make a positive difference? Maybe you send them to live with your family members in other cities where they can go to school and grow into adults.
That could work if you have family members living somewhere else and your displaced kids stay off of social media. These are two big questions and I don’t have the answers. Let’s start a online dialogue and figure out how to save our children.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons, Fathers and Daughters or Fathers and their Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
The Beauty Inside…
Last week I had a chance to spend time with my biological sister and my wonderful sorority sisters of Alpha Kappa Alpha. It was our biennial conference and thousands of us descended onto Atlanta, Georgia. It was a beautiful sight, and connecting with each other, some who I hadn’t seen in two years, was just great. My sorors are part of my extended family.
However I also thought about my biological sister and how blessed I am to have her in my life. I know there are families where sisters don’t get along or support each other. I’m the oldest, and when I was growing up, my mother told me to look out for my sister. I never forgot my mother’s words and we continue to look out for each other.
I also look out for my “girls” – ladies I grew up with and those who are more recent friends. That’s something we were raised with, but I don’t think it’s being taught anymore. Look out for your family, friends, or neighbors. It’s about me and nothing more. That’s probably why there are the random acts of violence taking place all over the world instead of random acts of kindness.
Do me a favor. Smile at someone as you walk down the street. Hold the door open for a perfect stranger. Let a car pull out in front of you and instead of cursing, give them a friendly nod. Sisterliness begins with me and I’m paying it forward.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for aging parents, Mothers and Daughters or Mothers and their Sons. Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
While we may come from different walks of life, as women young and old, we share common challenges, goals and passions. If you want to share the love with girls and other womenfolk join me on August 14, 2016 by attending my Mom & Me ❤ Tea, designed to provide a setting where girls and their caregivers can enjoy an afternoon of communication, culture and fun together. Register here.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Coach & Author
http://www.clynnwilliams.com
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