Posts filed under ‘emotional eating’

Why do most diets fail? (reprinted)

At this time of the year, the weather has changed to wonderful my favorite time of the year #fall and my body tells me it’s time to get red-bean-chili2ready for winter. Heavier foods like homemade soup, and chili are more bearable because the weather isn’t so hot. One of the issues I face is how to eat smart and not eat Everything I love!

So I was talking to Aga Loncar, the author of this blog post, and she said an amazing thing about food, weight and eating. If you are constantly dieting or care about what you eat, keep reading.

Why do most weight loss diets fail? by Aga Loncar woman-dieting

We think of weight loss the wrong way. We think that we can go on a restrictive diet for 30 and lose weight. And we do lose weight, but 95% of us gain it back plus often times more than what we lost. Every time we yo-yo diet the fat lost that we gained back becomes more resistant, its harder to lose it the second or third time around.

Companies that design restrictive diets and sell their products, as a required part of the program don’t addresses the real cause of weight gain like hormone malfunction, systemic inflammation, poor gut health or even chronic dehydration. Their main agenda is to sell you the product. If you come back again because you gained all the weight back, well even better.

This approach doesn’t teach us the importance of changing our poor eating habits forever, not just for 30 days. Frankly it doesn’t teach us anything.

Nobody brushes their teeth 5 times a day for 30 days, then stops and hopes that they will just remain clean forever. Sounds like a silly example, but it isn’t this essentially what 30 day diets are, all in and then nothing.

We choose 30 day diets and detox programs because we tend to pick a path with the lowest resistance. As long as we think this easier option exists we will go for it. The truth is however when it comes to health and permanent fat loss, it doesn’t. There is no 30 day detox program that actually works, it is all a marketing hype.

Please watch this short informative video: 

Our bodies have an amazing detox system put in place, like skin, liver, etc. The best “detox” is to stop eating all the crap. To read more click here.

C. Lynn says – As women, we often eat to satisfy our unmet needs for love, attention, sex, nurture, etc. How many times have you eaten a bag of potato chips and a soda pop or a plate of meatloaf and mashed potatoes… and while it may have satisfied you momentarily, those same unmet urges come stress-and-unmet-needs-1back. I believe when we (women, moms, wives) take time to care for ourselves, while balancing parenting, love lives and work lives, there will be no need for dieting, binge eating.

If this is your story and you want to change it, let’s chat. Send me an email: to set up some time to talk.

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C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Family Dynamics Strategist, Coach & Author

October 12, 2016 at 2:34 pm Leave a comment

Oh Weight!

It’s that time of year again, when I excitedly clean out my closet and begin to think about weight 2buying new outfits to wear. Normally by this time, I have started my Lenten fasting and am comfortable looking at myself in the mirror. This year is a little different. During the fall and winter months, I was busy going back and forth to the various hospitals and nursing homes that took care of my father. I thought about eating healthy foods and tried, but I really found that food made me feel…better… while I processed the fact that my father was dying.

As I attend my different women’s conferences and workshops, I look around and notice my heavily figured friends and associates who too are carrying extra weight. I can’t help thinking how many are care givers for ailing parents or family members, and just don’t have the will power or time to eat a healthy meal. How many of us are emotional eaters? When I think about women like me, I think about all the issues that increased weight brings to us in the way of diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease, cancer. Oweightkay! I’ve got my own attention again. No more candy and I suppose I can give up cookies too!

Interested in learning more about your health or your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging parents, Mothers and Daughters or Mothers and Sons. Email me at:


C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Author, Coach & Family Dynamics Specialist
Trying to Stay Sane While Raising Your Teen (St. Paul Press, 2010)
The Pampered Prince: Moms Create a GREAT Relationship with Your Son (St. Paul Press, 2012)
Raising Your Daughter Through the Joys, Tears & HORMONES! (220 Publishing, 2013)
NEW Yours & Mine: The Winning Blended Family Formula (220 Publishing, 2015)

March 7, 2016 at 9:20 pm 1 comment

Do Your Kids #Misbehave? Here’s What You Can Do…

Sharing a post written by Ray Mathis on misbehavior in kids. I like what he says because he agrees with my 4-Goals-of-Misbehavior-Understanding-Your-Childs-Actionsphilosophy that when you parent and correct the “mis” behavior of your kids, you can’t respond emotionally. When we respond emotionally, we overreact and the message is lost on our children. See a portion of his article below.

Why Kids Do Things That Aren’t Good for Them & What to do About It

Why do kids do things like that?!

I’ve heard exasperated adults ask that question hundreds of times during my forty year career working with young people. I’ve heard kids ask the same question about their parents and I’ve asked the same question about mine. I first learned the answer in a basic psychology class in college: People start and continue to do things because it serves a purpose. Behavior is always goal-orientated.[1] There are three things which can lead to misbehavior in children: mistaken goals, emotions, and beliefs.

Mistaken Goals

It’s probably safe to assume that most people would like to live as long as they can, be healthy, happy, and successful; however, people often have what Rudolph Dreikurs[2] called mistaken goals[3] which takes them off course. They get something out of acting on these mistaken goals; however, their actions make it less likely that they’ll get what they really want in the long run. This definitely applies to children.

Dreikurs suggested that when kids experience feelings of not belonging to their social group, they engage in misbehavior which arises from one of four mistaken goals:

Think about a difficult interaction with your child, a child you’ve cared for, or a student in your classroom.

Did you feel annoyed? Perhaps the child’s goal was getting attention.
Did you feel beaten or intimidated? Perhaps the child’s goal was power and control.
Did you feel hurt? Perhaps the child’s goal was revenge.
Did you feel incapable? Perhaps the child’s goal was helplessness or inadequacy.

Consider that misbehavior in kids may be the tip of the iceberg. There can be things going on beneath the surface of a child’s mind, especially when they do things we don’t like, or that aren’t good for them. Misbehavior can be a symptom of the thoughts and feelings a child may need help with rather than the problem.


Emotions can serve as energy to enhance our lives; however, people often generate what I call a dysfunctional amount of emotion – more emotion than is helpful or necessary, more than they want to have, and more than they know what to do with. It works against them instead of for them.[4][5] Anger, anxiety, depression, shame, and guilt can fit these definitions. As an educator, I’ve seen people do many unhealthy, self-defeating, unacceptable, and even self-destructive things when they felt these emotions. I saw my parents do it too. My father did it by smoking and drinking. My mother did it by engaging in emotional eating.[6]


If you liked what you read, register @ Our Parenting Spot for more great articles, info and camaraderie with other parents just like you & me. So… how do you handle misbehavior in your children? Reach out to me on Twitter (@cgwwbook) or Facebook (CGWWBooks)


C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Author & Parent Coach

Trying to Stay Sane While Raising Your Teen (St. Paul Press, 2010)
The Pampered Prince: Moms Create a GREAT Relationship with Your Son (St. Paul Press, 2012)
Raising Your Daughter Through the Joys, Tears & HORMONES! (220 Publishing, 2013)

July 28, 2014 at 5:17 pm 4 comments

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