Posts filed under ‘Parenting’
5 Tips to Managing Your Time
Have you ever said I’ll do that later, only to find that there were at least 3 more things waiting for you to complete…later? For the next 2 ½ minutes, read this carefully and take notes. I am giving you five free tips for mastering your time management. Truly these tips will transform your chaotic day into a calm experience. For years, I had an issue with time. It’s not that I couldn’t arrive on time; it’s making sure that what I was leaving had been completed. For example, I hate leaving the house with tasks undone like cleaning up the kitchen, putting a load of clothes in the wash or finishing one of my tasks as an entrepreneur.
Here’s the secret. I suffered from that syndrome that many working mothers experience in their everyday lives. Perfectionism! I don’t know about you, but I was taught that having a clean, orderly house was my responsibility. Nobody told me to go out and be successful, and by the way, don’t worry about your house. It’ll take care of itself! I also was not taught how to manage household activities as a successful entrepreneur. I did learn it and offer it as one of the lessons in my Kick the Chaos coaching program.
Managing your time is a skill that you want to develop into a habit. Being successful in business may mean you won’t have a clean house. Look at your guy friends or your spouse. When they have appointments or meetings, they are out the door. I know this is true for my husband. It doesn’t matter what’s not operating perfectly (or imperfectly in our home), he practices good time management. ALWAYS!
Clearly in business, timeliness is next to godliness and having a reputation that you can’t make it to meetings or events on time can discredit your credibility. If you have children at home, getting them out of the house (on time) can also impact your schedule. You’re ready for success, aren’t you?
Try these simple tips:
- Set your intention to manage your time today.
Decide today that you are going to manage your time. I learned a long time ago that thoughts are things and if you want to attract specific things into your life, you have to change your thoughts. (It works!)
- Do it now or set a reasonable date for later.
Don’t obsess over what needs to be done. Decide what your most urgent tasks are and do them. If time does not permit this, schedule the tasks on your calendar.
- Make a list of what you want to complete.
I am a big proponent of creating lists, because my dominant learning style is visual and seeing a picture of my daily to dos, keeps it fresh on my mind. Depending on how urgent they are or how many I have, I schedule them in my phone.
- Give yourself time to be on time.
I learned this habit before my kids were born. Take your shower and put on your make-up when you first get up in the morning. For health enthusiasts and meditation gurus like me, pray and work out, then take your shower and put on your make-up. I find that giving myself time to be on time, means I have to work smartly.
- Stop Rushing!
Successful entrepreneurs and business women give themselves time to get to their places of business or meetings. Speeding down the highway and honking your horn before the light turns green is not going to help you make that meeting in a timely fashion. Giving yourself 15 extra minutes allows for unexpected delays.
Become a master by practicing these five time management tips daily. You are on your way to a transformed life.
Imagine what it’s like have great time management and work-life balance!
If you are struggling to make this happen, click Here and schedule a complimentary discovery session with me. Want to be a part of something big? Click Here to join my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, creator of Finding Superwoman™
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
www.clynnwilliams.com
Manners Matter
Have you ever seen something and wondered – ‘Did I just see that!’ 
I was driving on the expressway and traffic was really congested. In broad daylight a man pulled over to the side of the road and proceeded to pull out his genitals and use the bathroom! WHAT?!? Seriously!?! I thought what kind of home training did he have?
In another situation, a woman begins to talk on her phone. You can hear the voice on the other end of the phone because she has her caller on speakerphone. Why?
I met with one of my clients last week, at a public playroom for kids, since she had her kiddos with her. The playroom reminded me of when my kids were invited to places to play with each other while parents got to know each other. The biggest difference between then and now is that a few of the parents were on their phones while their child played.
What she did next got my attention. Before allowing her son to play with the other kids, she reminded him of the ‘house rules‘. The house rules were her expectations of his behavior. “Play nice.” “Hitting is not a way to resolve a problem.” Her little guy was only 4 1/2 years old, but he was being taught how to handle conflict and remain mannerable! She said that she noticed that when he and another child had conflict, he would hit. She wanted to teach him other ways to resolve conflict besides hitting (or taking what he wanted). Manners do matter, maybe not to adults who urinate on the side of expressways or when talking on speakerphone in public places. 
Manners are behaviors that are taught either by how you are raised or what you see at home. If kids are taught to be mannerable by adults who are mannerable, then that’s what they are. If the environment where you live, permits misbehavior like disrespect, littering, fighting, road rage, temper tantrums, things like that; then manners don’t matter to you.
But we live in a global society, where people from many cultures are expected to get along with each other. Manners matter because how we live our everyday lives spills over into how we treat each other and our neighbors. Respecting each other, protecting our environment and raising our children to do the same is what matters.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting relationship programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons or Fathers and Daughters.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
The Problem with Procrastination
Have you ever decided that you were going to complete a task – not a big deal, yet you found yourself thinking about it and thinking about it and 
thinking about it until the time for you to complete it was over?
I have that problem when it comes to catalogs that come in the mail. I see something I want, but I think about it over and over and over again until it is no longer of interest to me.
That my friend is called PROCRASTINATION!
Procrastination occurs for me when I have a decision to make and I’m not quite sure if I should move forward with it or not. Perhaps procrastination occurs for you too in your business or in personal decisions that you need to make. Let me share a couple of tips with you when you feel like you’re stuck and can’t move forward.
One: If it’s a really big decision, I create a pros and cons sheet. Pros and cons allow me to look at the positives and negatives of moving forward with my decision, and it gives me an opportunity to let my higher spirit weigh in for things I hadn’t considered.
Two: I think about lost opportunity. Lost opportunity is important whether it’s in my business or when it comes to my family. The lost opportunity is what is the consequence for me not moving forward; what do I have to lose if I don’t move forward, and what do I gain by moving forward. You would be surprised at how powerful it is to look at lost opportunity.
Take a moment and think about where you would be if procrastination had not gotten your attention. Some decisions you don’t get to think over and over. Just like some opportunities don’t re-present themselves. Procrastination is just another form of fear, and I urge you to draw a line in the sand and move forward. You have more regrets from something you did not accomplish than something you tried and it did not work.
- Take a chance!
- Make a decision.
- No regrets!
This is your time to shine. Your best days are ahead of you.
Interested in gaining more balance in your life? Contact me – MsParentGuru to receive information about my inspiring parenting and coaching programs.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
Focus: A Necessity for Working Mothers
Focus 3…2…1 
How many times have you taken a picture and it was either blurry or unfocused? If the picture was on your phone and the object that you wanted to photograph was still available, you could retake the picture. Besides a daily dose of sanity and a refillable cup of faith, the one resource that I need as a working mother is Focus!
But what if the blurriness occurs every time you took a photo? You would either have the camera repaired or you replace it. Imagine if the blurriness is something that is taking place in your life day after day? As my mom used to tell me – “You’re stretched too thin.” I never felt like I was stretched too thin, however I learned to prioritize the things I needed (or wanted) to do. Some things had to be taken care of immediately and others could be completed at a later time. Through those times when I let everything build up and overwhelm me, was when I learned the importance of focus.
As a working mother, you already have a full plate of busy because you work and raise children. If you are also married, your plate is even fuller. Add civic or social responsibilities and now your plate is completely running over. Whether you’re a mother in a two-parent household, a single parent household or you’re co-parenting; staying focused is a necessity to ensure a smoothly running work and family life along with a sane mind.
There are a many ways to stay focused. Here are two tools that I use daily:
Planning and To-Do Lists
Planning is my first tool of choice. Early in my first marriage, I realized that my parents and in-laws wanted us to share our holidays with them. Since they lived far apart from each other, I started talking about Thanksgiving plans no later than Labor Day weekend. Our kids’ summer break was usually solidified by Clean Up Week (spring break). As a divorced mom, my ex and I shared joint custody. Joint custody meant every other weekend, my kids spent the weekend with their father. Early in our marriage, as my husband and I blended our children into a blended family, we continued to share joint custody. Planning dates and time together was essential for our family, us (as a couple) and my peace of mind. Planning the kids’ schedules meant weekly conversations with the refrigerator calendar jotting down dates like band concerts, track meets, teacher conferences and school project supplies. Putting them on the calendar saved me from getting notes on my pillow starting with “Mom, I need…”Planning didn’t stop all surprises, but gave me peace and less tasks to juggle.
My other tool of choice is my To-Do list. While I don’t have the daily pleasure of raising children anymore, our youngest is 26. I am writing, speaking and coaching and my schedule is busier than ever. Between my entrepreneurial pursuits, community commitments and events that my husband has, we are busy. I no longer write things down on paper, because the pad of paper is never with me when I want to add another task. I now use the notepad in my phone. It works perfectly and I always have it with me. Writing things down at least reminds me of what I need to do and yes I prioritize the tasks so that I complete the most important ones first.
Is my life perfect? Hell no! But it keeps this busy working mom from tearing her hair out.
I would love to share more helpful tips with you or help you make calm out of chaos. I offer a complimentary discovery consultation to explore some of those areas you’d like to handle differently. Click here to schedule time with me.
C. Lynn Williams, #Ms. Parent Guru
Asking For Help
How often do you ask for help? 
Once a day? Once a month? Never? I know my examples sound extreme but a few weeks ago, I was talking with one of my Finding Superwoman™ coaching clients and she talked about how overwhelmed she was at her home. She has a teen son, a tween daughter and a husband.
When I gently reminded her about these people that live at home with her, she laughed and said ‘Oh they won’t help out.’ 😨 ‘What do you mean they won’t help? Have you asked them?’ ‘Well no, I didn’t think I had to ask for help.’ I now understood her dilemma, she didn’t know how to ask for help. I grew up in a culture of everyone pitching in at home; with the exception of my dad whose only household chores were cutting the grass and painting. 🤷🏽♀️
As young kids, my mother trained us to pick up our toys and clean our rooms (before we were allowed to take our daily nap). As we got older, our responsibilities increased to include things like starting dinner and doing laundry.
My husband and I share household things like cooking and kitchen clean up. If I cook, he cleans the kitchen. The chores are not split equally but I don’t feel like Hazel the maid either.
Asking for help and training your children to help around the house is important for you to maintain a semblance of sanity and order. Whether you work outside of your home, or work from home, doing ‘everything’ does not help you manage your household workload or your peace of mind.
Teaching your children the value of taking responsibility for household chores builds character. It also helps you busy mom (or dad) to do those activities that are uniquely yours to do to insure that the household runs properly.
If you grew up in a house where your mom or dad did not require anything from you except to go to school and get good grades, then this is an opportunity to get outside of your parent comfort zone and build a new skill. It takes three things from you:
1. Decide what chores you want your child(ren) to do
2. Have a family meeting to discuss what your expectation is and when the chores will begin as well as the consequences of what will happen if the chores are not done
3. Be flexible as you establish these new routines. Rome wasn’t built in a day, nor will your tweens and teens easily accept a new set of responsibilities without some grumbling. Stay consistent with your expectations of them and stay sane!
For more tips like these, look for my weekly blog. Click here to download my Moms Can Have It All worksheet.
Best wishes,
C. Lynn Williams – #MsParentguru
Self-Care for Women Who Care
The phrase self-care is used a lot these days. It means practices and activities that we can do regularly to reduce stress and enhance our health and well-being. Remembering to take time for myself is something I have to do weekly if not daily.
As a busy woman, it’s easy to forget to take care of yourself especially if you are running a business, raising children or taking care of aging parents.
In my graphic at the top of this newsletter, are twelve simple things that you can do to practice taking care of yourself. Which ones appeal to you?
Here Are My 3 Favs:
- Be Positive. Creating a habit of positive thinking can transform not only the way you view the world, but how you move through it. Psychology Today 9/24/2014
- Have Fun. Children constantly invent ways to have fun. You can do the same thing! Have a play day, afternoon, or an hour where you do something completely FUN!
- Go Outside. When we were kids my parent’s favorite phrase was “Go Outside and Play”! I love being outside with Nature, whether it’s walking, jogging or messing around in my garden because it allows me to forget the issues that are on my mind. I usually have a solution when I take time with Nature. There’s something about being with Nature that uplifts and inspires me.
Are perfection issues derailing your relationships?
Text the word PERFECTION to 708-501-7060 to receive a neat gift and an opportunity to connect with me.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Award-winning Author & Motivational Speaker
Motherhood – The Greatest Role Ever
As March 2017 begins, I’m thinking about Women’s History Month, Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent, as well as my oldest daughter’s impending 
wedding. While each event influences my life in some way, anything related to my children touches me on a much deeper level.
My role as a mother has required that I learn how to:
- Love
- Share
- Care
- Stand firm
- Fight
- Listen
- Become fearless
- Hold my children (and myself) accountable
It’s the only role that I know of where you create a human legacy, and generations of people are born. Motherhood is a gift from our Creator that we can choose to be amazingly great at, or an abysmal failure. Often our childhood experiences shape the kind of mothers we become.
Mums and Babies
I will be sharing my thoughts about Motherhood today, March 1, 2017, 7:30 PM (CST) on Real Life, Real Love with Chatdaddy Sims on WVON 1390 AM. I would love for you to call in and join the conversation.
Interested in taking your family’s dynamics to a new level? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons or Fathers and Daughters.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
5 Steps to Overcoming the Guilt of Missed Milestones
When I was growing up, I never understood why my mom constantly talked to me about what to do if something other than what she planned – happened. I was the oldest, and she expected me to be able to continue to follow through if circumstances interrupted her plans for us. She was very intentional about planning and said it helped her manage her hectic schedule of being a wife, mother and a working woman, as well as ours. 
As a wife, mother and entrepreneur, I realize how important it is to plan for the unexpected, whether it’s a car accident that causes schedules to be delayed or whether it’s a last minute science project and supplies have to be purchased. I also know what’s like to miss an event for my kids and feeling guilty about it. One of the ways I help my clients is to help them work through issues like guilt and keep guilt, stress and overwhelm from making them feel inadequate, overwhelmed or like a failure.
2017 is a great year to lose your guilt. As an entrepreneur, wife and mother, there was nothing that stressed me out like an unexpected event or family emergency. I’ve learned how to move past guilt and I talked about it during my webinar on Tuesday. I shared 5 key steps to managing guilt during my Missed Milestones webinar as part of a plan to help working women and mothers get a better handle on stress and anxiety.
If you missed this free webinar, no worries, the replay is available until Wednesday, March 1st
Click here to watch the replay.
Don’t miss it! Kick the chaos out of your life!
When I mentor my clients about finding their superwoman, I encourage them to determine what is most important in each area of their life: work, family and relationships. Once they’ve sorted out what’s most important, we go to work determining how to remove guilt and those feelings of being overwhelmed by what our family members and work associates think about the decisions we’ve made.
You can have a wonderful relationship with your partner and your children as well as a promising career. If making this happen is really hard for you, text CONSULT to 708.501.7060 for a complimentary discovery session with me.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
Founder, Finding Superwoman™
http://www.clynnwilliams.com
Please Put That Away
I treated myself to lunch today and did what I love most — people watch. As a parent blogger, I find that there’s always a story either at the table next to or across from me in most restaurants. 
There wasn’t a lot going on next to me, so I looked around the room. I like watching people and their children. They make the most interesting stories to share.
I looked across the room and there was the most adorable African American boy staring back at me. He was probably 5 years old. I smiled at him and he waved. Pure love! His mom never looked up from her phone during our brief exchange. Nor did she look up or talk to him except once or twice with an angry look on her face. They were there when I got to my table and stayed about 45 minutes.
Now I’m intrigued because he was basically on his own to amuse himself without a w
ord from his mom. I guess in fairness I could have gone over and asked her if he was her son, but what if she told me to mind my own business? Not a good outcome.
I tried, really tried to mind my own business and starting playing Words with Friends but my curiosity took over and I looked over to see if they were having any interactions or conversations.
Nothing! He’s just a little boy, and I don’t know the history of their relationship. But when we ignore our kids, they either find other people to talk to or they act out for attention. He looked like he needed a hug. I wish I could have given him one. ❤
Kids take a lot of time and sometimes all we want is an hour by ourselves. I can help you figure that time out and relate to your kids. Give me a call. 224-357-6314
C. Lynn Williams
#MsParentguru
Author & Founder of Finding Superwoman
Help for Stressed Out Working Moms
When I was growing up, my mom and grandmother always told me that cleanliness is next to godliness. Right along with that saying, my mom stressed being organized. She felt that being organized helped her manage her hectic schedule of being a wife, mother and working.
As a wife, mother and entrepreneur, I realize how important it is to be organized not only in my home, but in my business and in my head. I’ve talked about it with my clients and often hear that they feel that staying organized is impossible especially at home because either the kids have their stuff everywhere or your partner does – or both are culprits.
Why not start now? 2017 is a great year to become more organized. As an entrepreneur, wife and mother, there is always something I need or should be doing with my time. On Tuesday, I shared 4 key steps to getting organized during my Getting Organized webinar. This webinar is a part of my Kick the Chaos strategy to help working women and mothers like you, get a better handle on their work-life balance.
If you missed this free webinar, no worries, I’ve posted the replay until Wednesday, Feb 1st
Click here to watch the replay: http://bit.ly/2k5TxW7
Don’t miss it! Kick the chaos out of your life!
When I coach my clients about finding their superwoman, I encourage them to determine what is most important in each area of their life: work, family and relationships. Once they’ve sorted out what’s most important, we go to work determining how to remove guilt and those feelings of being overwhelmed by what our family members and work associates think about the decisions we’ve made. You can have a wonderful relationship with your partner and your children as well as a promising career. If making this happen is really hard for you, text CONSULT to 708.501.7060 for a complimentary discovery session with me.
Staying Sane While Raising Your Teens 
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