How to Have Healthier Menfolk

As I sit here and eat a bag of Hershey’s kisses, I wonder how in the world my kids learned to stop loving junk food 😝 and stay healthy? 🤔

father and son exercising
Photo by Ksenia Chernaya on Pexels.com

Wonder how you build kids who love junk food, into healthy adults? 🍪🍟

This month of June, celebrates men and boy’s health. So let’s talk about physical health.

When it comes to male health, I literally have to call “the kids” when my husband needs to go to the doctor. He’s pretty clear that there is no need to go to the doctor.. just take an Advil or Dayquil and stay in the bed. 🤷🏽‍♀️

So you can imagine, there’s no such thing as scheduling an annual well visit.

Do you live with someone like that? 🤦🏽‍♀️

Scheduling annual well doctor and dentist visits are easy to do when our sons are young. They need both for school or to play sports. As they grow into men, it becomes more challenging to have them see a doctor as a preventative measure. My husband would rather write a check for a million dollars 💵 than have a wellness visit. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Photo by Thirdman on Pexels.com

It’s a shame that body parts have to stop working, in order to visit the doctor. Maybe it’s the “if it’s not broken, don’t fix it” strategy.

If the males in your family are the same way, it might be easier to help them eat healthier. Personally, I like vegetables and a fish protein since I don’t eat meat. I get a little push back if I make what my husband calls, double greens. 🥬 For example, cooking stir fry veggies and a side of spinach is considered double greens. On those days, I’m pressing my luck.

With your sons, especially if they play a sport, having a good amount of healthy carbs makes eating junk food less enticing. Maybe they’re not interested in eating grapes, apples and cherries, but have them in the fridge. Having popcorn, cheese bites, and healthy snacks in the pantry, may make flaming hots, or hot Cheetos less attractive.

I recommend starting a healthy regime now at the beginning of the summer before more bad eating habits get started.

Consider adding in a mother-son (or husband-wife) evening walk to give you time with each other, and a little exercise.

Or… encourage your husband and son to go to the park and throw a baseball, football, play soccer, or run on the track together. You might get push back if they’ve not done this before. Just keep encouraging them.

I’ve been trying to get my husband to walk with me in the evening, so that we don’t become a fixed part of the sofa. 😂 I’ll keep trying.

At the end of the day, exercising and healthy eating, can help you control your weight and keep your sanity.

Write me and let me know how successful you are with the males in your family. I’ll do the same. 👀

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parent coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

June 23, 2022 at 10:00 am Leave a comment

What is Your Teen Doing This Summer?

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I was talking with one of my parents on social media about kids working and what we did (as kids) when summer break occurred.

One of the things that was always understood was that my sister, brother and I did not have summers off. We may have been out of school, but we either had book lists to read and write reports on, we attended day camp; we were camp counselors or we had summer jobs. We did not take the summer off and get up when we felt like it. 🤷🏽‍♀️

My mom said that “An idle mind is the devil’s playhouse.” 😈

The relationship between entitlement that parents complain about, and their inability to set boundaries on what they require their child to do or not do is very interesting. Teens will never admit that they want to work, go to camp, or read books during summer break.

No firm plans for the summer doesn’t do anything for your child but allow them to get into mischief, or start bad habits for getting up in the fall and the next school year.

A relationship that I find interesting, is the importance of teaching our kids how to earn and manage money. My parents tied our allowance to weekly chores as a way to help us learn how to earn and save money.

Requiring your child to work, complete chores around the house, cut grass for neighbors, babysit, or work part-time, builds character and responsibility.

“An idle mind is the devil’s playhouse.”

I would love to hear how you will work with your child this summer to help them build responsibility and character. 💪🏽

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parent coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

June 10, 2022 at 11:33 pm Leave a comment

Education Technology and the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act

COPPA

Are you aware that the Children’s Online Policy Statement, announced on May 25th, affirms that kids under 13 shouldn’t have to give up their privacy rights just to do their schoolwork? It also tells ed tech providers they can’t require parents and schools to agree to the comprehensive surveillance of children in exchange for students’ use of such learning tools.

 

Even before the pandemic forced kids into virtual learning platforms, ed tech has been used in schools. The FTC is working to ensure that the companies offering this technology are following the law – and to let parents know that the FTC is watching what information companies collect about kids, how they use it, for how long they keep it, and how they protect it. When it comes to protecting kids’ personal information, the FTC is on the side of parents who are concerned about data collection and privacy.

 

That’s why I am sharing their consumer blog (also available in Spanish) with my audience, and letting people know about this important topic. To read the policy statement, visit: COPPA statement. For more information about protecting kids online, visit ftc.gov/parents.

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parent coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

clynnwilliams.com

June 3, 2022 at 2:30 pm Leave a comment

What Do I Need to Do To Get Your Attention❓

Starting my How to Love Yourself in 30 Days online course on June 5th. Click on the link to join.

What’s one of the first things you do when you get a moment to yourself? You probably pull out your phone. 📱

There’s so much you can do on your phone. You can have a whole conversation by text or talking. You can play a game, shop or watch one of your favorite shows.

However, when you’re raising children, there’s so much of you that’s required for them to grow up healthy: physically, mentally, and emotionally. Most important is to know what’s going on in their heads.

I was talking to one of my friends about their kids who are under the age of 5. We all agreed that if your child was awake and the house was quiet 🤫, they were probably getting into something! You had to watch them constantly!

baby in bathroom

As our kids get older, we feel that we don’t have to watch them as closely and assume that things are okay with them. If they weren’t, our kids would tell us. Natural assumption right?

Wrong!

In families today, our children are relying on us to put aside our devices and initiate discussions; listen to what’s going on with them. It’s not easy….

Your teen will talk. They have to be assured that you’re listening and won’t judge them. There can’t be any topic that you won’t discuss with them. Are you willing to talk about anything and everything? Can you listen without letting your facial expressions show how horrified you are with the conversation? 😫🤯

We are living in times where anything is possible and are kids want to explore, try out new and different theories, relationships and experiences. Being able to share their thoughts and concerns with you, helps them put them in perspective. Keeping the lines of communication open, by relating to your child’s thoughts and feelings; asking them what they think – makes all the difference in the world.

Have a meal together; it doesn’t matter which one. First require that all phones and tablets be put away. 2nd requirement: allow your child the freedom to say whatever is on their mind (must be respectful). Ask “Tell me what’s going on”. The first several conversations may be awkward while your kids try to figure out if you’re being honest and whether they can say what they feel. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Every time I hear or read about another mass shooting; I wonder who the shooter had to talk to within his family. If they shot or killed a family member before taking other lives, I wonder what kind of dysfunction was taking place. Were they able to share the fact that they were being bullied or that they were feeling anti-social? Were they abused? Are they suffering from a mental illness that went unaddressed?

Shooter & Ak rifle

I realize these are simple questions for complex issues. But what I do know is that young people have lots of challenges going on in their lives these days. We as parents can’t solve them all. However, being watchful, following your intuition (if you feel something is wrong, it is) and making it safe to tell you what’s going on, goes a long way to minimize issues that cause our kids to self-harm or harm others. Peace.

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parent coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

clynnwilliams.com

May 26, 2022 at 9:15 pm Leave a comment

My Spouse and I Parent Very Differently

How is it possible that the person you fell in love with; who understands you perfectly and finishes your sentences… parents so differently from you?

Not only do they parent differently, it’s inconsistent, they show favorites with your kids and it’s ALL WRONG 😑

Well, I wonder if they feel the same way about you?

The funny thing about parenting, is this: how can someone else tell you how to raise your child? Yet, that’s exactly what has to happen when you coparent whether you are in the same household or in separate households.

Ideally you discuss things that are important to you to instill in your children before they are born. If it’s important that your son or daughter to speak candidly, then your spouse can’t be annoyed when your out-spoken child speaks at a family gathering (and the comment embarrasses you).

Parenting isn’t one of those “scripted” professions. You start out with the best intentions of raising your child together, until you hit a non-negotiable topic.

Here are 3 things to consider to help you resolve those sticky parenting issues:

  • Take a moment to calm down (if you’re angry)
  • Think about whether you can accept what your spouse is saying (lose the ego)
  • Communicate your concerns with your spouse (outside of your child’s hearing)

Trying to talk while angry, is insanity. Once you calm down, you may feel differently and be willing to compromise. Marriage and raising children require compromise and patience from both of you. Acceptance of your spouse’s parenting style is important to your relationship, and the relationship of your spouse and child.

If you or your spouse are the bonus parent, and are new to the parent-child relationship, either one of you may have a difficult time, “allowing” the other parent to share in important decisions, behavior management and life issues. It’s a normal human emotion to be protective of your child. However, the blending takes place when you share your concerns and decide how to handle.

That was the challenge my husband and I faced when we married and blended our children of previous relationships together. It wasn’t easy when we started. It took a lot of conversations and a few arguments (when the kids were not around). It also took prayer and patience. Our children are adults now, and we are celebrating 20 years of marriage later this year.

You can do this!

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

clynnwilliams.com

April 28, 2022 at 8:00 pm Leave a comment

Easter: Preparing for What’s Next

As we prepare for Easter week, I think about some of the things that we did when our kids were growing up. My husband and I wanted to share our faith with our children, but we also wanted them to have fun. 🤩🐣

While there was always an Easter program at church that our kids participated in, we did things like dye eggs for Easter egg hunts, find hidden Easter eggs in the yard and attended good Friday service.

As our kids got older we talked about giving up “something” for Lent, as a sacrifice, as a way to understand what Jesus gave up by going through the Cruxifixion.

This week, as I celebrate Maundy Thursday and Good Friday, I think about the people I have met this year. Was I kind and generous? Have I done my best to share my faith as a Christian?

I hope so.

Happy Easter 🐣🐰 ☦️

C. Lynn Williams, MsParentguru

clynnwilliams.com

April 14, 2022 at 12:53 pm Leave a comment

What Being Patient Does Not Mean

Have you ever had somebody tell you, “just be patient, it will come in time.”?

What did you think?

Did a little guilt or anger creep in? Or perhaps all you could think about is OMG, when is “it” going to happen!?

The problem with statements like just be patient, is that we are impatient by nature. We want what we want, right away. Today’s technology just exacerbates that right-now mentality because of our ability to request & respond to people immediately!

Today, I’m not interested in talking about how to be patient; what I do want to talk about, is what being patient does not mean.

For creative, inventive, amazing people, there are many other things to do, to prepare for what’s coming. Here are things I think about when I am waiting

  • Is there any preparation that I can complete?
  • Are there other unrelated tasks that need to be completed?
  • What fun activities can I do, to take my mind off of “are we there yet” questions?
  • Walking, yoga, running, or working-out, are great activities to help you refocus

Preparing for something new that’s coming into my life, whether it’s a book that I’m writing, new clients joining my coaching program, or a vacation that I sorely need, requires patience.

Being patient does not mean being inactive or sitting still. Instead you are focusing your energies on activities, thoughts and preparation, so that when what you are expecting to come, occurs, you are ready for it!

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parenting coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

April 5, 2022 at 8:00 am Leave a comment

Raising Our Daughters to be Fearless

My daughter and me

As we celebrate Women’s History Month, I think back to when I found out our firstborn child would be a girl. Coming from a long line of strong women, I was excited to be a girlmom. 😆

I believe in women being bold, sassy and speaking their truths. What better way to raise a daughter who would live life from her internal perspective instead of how the world thinks she should live.

What’s crazy is that nobody expects girls to speak with confidence, especially girls of color. 🙄 As mothers, we have to encourage that confidence daily, so that our daughters are comfortable speaking up and out whether with their girlfriends, boyfriends, in the classroom or in their work environments. Living life on your own terms is important today where there are many opportunities to succeed, even when people tell you, you can’t.

Patience is key in this relationship with our daughter(s). As you help her build her “voice”, she will use it to argue and sometimes compete with you.🗣 Don’t be offended, just know that as her staunchest supporter – her mom, you are someone she trusts and loves.

Be her fence, love her unconditionally, but give her room to grow. She may make decisions that you don’t respect as she grows and matures. It’s okay. It has to be okay – it’s her life. Be there as her guide and coach.

Enjoy the journey with her, as she becomes the woman you always wanted and expected her to become. 🌸💕🌺

C. Lynn Williams, aka MsParentguru

clynnwilliams.com

March 9, 2022 at 3:29 pm Leave a comment

How to Boost Your Confidence to the Max

Image via Unsplash

When you exude confidence and you’re comfortable in your own skin, the world becomes a better place, and you attract positivity. During times of stress, your mental and physical health can take a nosedive, and it affects your outlook on everything. There are many steps you can take to get your motivation back on track so that you can look and feel your best. Guest blog by Gwen Payne from invisiblemoms.com.

Ways to Look and Feel Good

Sign up for a family photoshoot

Family photoshoots can inject a lot of fun into your life and give you an opportunity to connect with your loved ones. For the photoshoot, you can dress up and make an effort, which can help make you feel positive about your appearance. A skilled photographer will capture you and your family in the best light, making everyone look and feel good. 

Improve your nutrition

Both sugar and caffeine give you an instant boost of energy, but too much can make your body crash and become fatigued. Too many additives, sugar, and processed foods can lead to weight gain. Improving your overall nutrition with a balanced diet can help clear brain fog and give you more body confidence. 

Improve your living space

When your house is cluttered, disorganized and messy, it can feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. And most likely, you never want anyone to visit. If you love to entertain, this is likely holding you back from spending time with friends and family. Fortunately, you can easily reverse this! Spend a few weekends clearing out everything, cleaning and reorganizing your space. Next, open the shades, light some scented candles and add some new decor, and your home will be primed for maximum positivity.

Set goals 

Set future goals and hold yourself accountable. When setting goals it’s important to make them challenging but achievable by breaking a big goal down into short and long-term goals. Draw up a step-by-step plan to achieve your goal, and then break it down into daily tasks. If you don’t achieve your daily or monthly goal, do better the next month. 

A good goal is to go after career and academic goals. For example, if you’ve always wanted to get your master’s degree, enroll in an online program to start. An MBA program can increase your business knowledge in areas such as strategic planning and leadership, and enhance your self-awareness and self-assessment abilities. 

Monthly pamper sessions

Don’t feel guilty about indulging in some pampering, as these can be great for detoxing, circulation, and creating a sense of calm. Whether it’s a sports massage or spa treatment, these moments can really make you feel good about yourself.

Pursue a childhood hobby

Get in touch with your child-like spirit by pursuing a hobby you enjoyed as a child. Loved roller skating? Buy a pair of skates! Enjoyed dancing and gymnastics? Sign-up for online dance classes. You don’t have to be the best at it — just do something you enjoy. 

Outdoor activities

Nature has the power to rejuvenate both mind and body. Take up an outdoor sport like running, walking, hiking, biking, or watersports, to enjoy the healing effect of nature and the rush of endorphins. Treat yourself to new gear when you take up an outdoor sport. Track your progress by investing in a fitness watch where you can download apps to map out new routes and monitor your efforts in real-time.

Take Steps to Feel Good

If you’re stuck in a rut, you’ll have to make a conscious effort to change. The most important thing is sticking to a game plan and making one small change at first.  

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parenting coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

March 2, 2022 at 2:39 pm Leave a comment

Is It Really Okay to Not Be Ok?

Many of us view success as pretty, handsome, moneyed, good job, well-liked…

Then when we don’t achieve success for any of the reasons listed below or more…

  • Haven’t finished (or started) college
  • Don’t have the right job
  • Grew up in the wrong neighborhood
  • Married… didn’t marry
  • Wrong skin color, gender, religious belief

We wonder why we feel defeated, depressed, uninspired.

Or, we have “everything going for ourselves”, outwardly as my mom would say, and yet we feel defeated, depressed, or uninspired inside. Today in our How to ❤️ Love ❤️ Yourself More…Intentionally clubhouse, we talked about how being pretty and beautiful are NICE, but have nothing to do with how you feel inside. People are obsessed with looks and fortune. How can you be sad and depressed when you have good looks and wealth?

Easy!

As my co-moderator said, we are “cracked glass” and looking out we don’t see our external beauty and wealth. We only feel brokenness and sadness. Many of us live in quiet desperation and don’t know how to find our way out.

Suicide is not the answer.

I’ve lost several family members to suicide and while I don’t know exactly what each one felt before taking their life, I know what it feels to be the one left to pick up the pieces and try to figure out what happened? Each member had worth and value but did not feel that there was another way for their story to be told.

One of the best things you can do is open up and share your pain with a supportive friend, group, or a therapist. The other thing to do is remember, you are unique with a God-given purpose! Be who you want to be instead of a copy of someone else. Stop buying the “image” and be the original – one of a kind – amazing you!  

Interested in loving yourself more deeply? Click Here – to schedule a complimentary chat with Ms. Parent Guru about how her How to Love Yourself In 30 Days coaching program can support you.

Click Here to become a part of her parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

February 4, 2022 at 1:00 pm Leave a comment

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