Posts filed under ‘working moms’

How to Boost Your Confidence to the Max

Image via Unsplash

When you exude confidence and you’re comfortable in your own skin, the world becomes a better place, and you attract positivity. During times of stress, your mental and physical health can take a nosedive, and it affects your outlook on everything. There are many steps you can take to get your motivation back on track so that you can look and feel your best. Guest blog by Gwen Payne from invisiblemoms.com.

Ways to Look and Feel Good

Sign up for a family photoshoot

Family photoshoots can inject a lot of fun into your life and give you an opportunity to connect with your loved ones. For the photoshoot, you can dress up and make an effort, which can help make you feel positive about your appearance. A skilled photographer will capture you and your family in the best light, making everyone look and feel good. 

Improve your nutrition

Both sugar and caffeine give you an instant boost of energy, but too much can make your body crash and become fatigued. Too many additives, sugar, and processed foods can lead to weight gain. Improving your overall nutrition with a balanced diet can help clear brain fog and give you more body confidence. 

Improve your living space

When your house is cluttered, disorganized and messy, it can feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. And most likely, you never want anyone to visit. If you love to entertain, this is likely holding you back from spending time with friends and family. Fortunately, you can easily reverse this! Spend a few weekends clearing out everything, cleaning and reorganizing your space. Next, open the shades, light some scented candles and add some new decor, and your home will be primed for maximum positivity.

Set goals 

Set future goals and hold yourself accountable. When setting goals it’s important to make them challenging but achievable by breaking a big goal down into short and long-term goals. Draw up a step-by-step plan to achieve your goal, and then break it down into daily tasks. If you don’t achieve your daily or monthly goal, do better the next month. 

A good goal is to go after career and academic goals. For example, if you’ve always wanted to get your master’s degree, enroll in an online program to start. An MBA program can increase your business knowledge in areas such as strategic planning and leadership, and enhance your self-awareness and self-assessment abilities. 

Monthly pamper sessions

Don’t feel guilty about indulging in some pampering, as these can be great for detoxing, circulation, and creating a sense of calm. Whether it’s a sports massage or spa treatment, these moments can really make you feel good about yourself.

Pursue a childhood hobby

Get in touch with your child-like spirit by pursuing a hobby you enjoyed as a child. Loved roller skating? Buy a pair of skates! Enjoyed dancing and gymnastics? Sign-up for online dance classes. You don’t have to be the best at it — just do something you enjoy. 

Outdoor activities

Nature has the power to rejuvenate both mind and body. Take up an outdoor sport like running, walking, hiking, biking, or watersports, to enjoy the healing effect of nature and the rush of endorphins. Treat yourself to new gear when you take up an outdoor sport. Track your progress by investing in a fitness watch where you can download apps to map out new routes and monitor your efforts in real-time.

Take Steps to Feel Good

If you’re stuck in a rut, you’ll have to make a conscious effort to change. The most important thing is sticking to a game plan and making one small change at first.  

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parenting coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

March 2, 2022 at 2:39 pm Leave a comment

Who We Are Matters

Photo by Markus Spiske on Pexels.com

When I was growing up, my mom would tell me that my actions were a direct reflection of my home training by her and my dad. While I hated hearing that, I taught the same thing to my children as well.

Who we are matters.

I have been trying to write today’s blog since the January 6 insurrection at the White House. As I watched the people storm through the barriers, break glass, pump their fists, and FaceTime their audiences; all I could think of was “What would your mom (or dad) think of you?” Also, how could I explain (to my children) why these people are allowed to deface the nation’s capitol without being dragged to jail. Most of the people who participated in the insurrection were white males and females.

The other major event that has my attention, is a rash of carjackings/robberies that have been taking place in different communities in the Chicagoland area. Many of the young people who are carjacking people, are young black teenagers. I thought how I would feel if one of those young men was my son.

In each case, I’m angry and think what kind of training did the insurrectionists and carjackers receive at home while growing up? Were they raised to respect others? Were they respected by the people they lived with?

Here’s something that I want parents to remember: how your child shows up is a reflection of how you interacted with them. Children aren’t born to fight and attack. They learn that behavior. When you grow up in an angry environment, that’s what you do when you respond to situations whether you understand what’s going on or not.

There are many young people who are raising themselves; who are not participating in online school learning, (parents may or may not be home with them) and who are trying to survive. Survival tells them that they must steal from other people in order to survive. They believe If they don’t steal, they won’t eat or they will be unsheltered.

The insurrectionists have been told that the rights and privileges that they are used to experiencing, are going away. Having to play nice with people that don’t look like them, is a scary idea!

In both cases, people are afraid. They feel that they don’t matter. And when people feel that they don’t matter, they do extraordinarily dumb things to help those around them know that they do matter.

So what does that mean to everybody else?

  • God made us a little lower than the angels, which means we are powerful.
  • We are each other’s keepers.
  • No one can achieve what they are trying to achieve by themselves.
  • Our differences and cultures are okay – we don’t have act like anybody else to succeed.

Raising your children to “be somebody” as my grandmother used to say, is still noble and honorable. Love and respect yourself and know that what you do to others and for others – Matters. ✌🏽

What are your thoughts?

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parenting coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

clynnwilliams.com

Reprinted from January 28, 2021

January 13, 2022 at 8:15 am Leave a comment

I Heard Family…

family

Last week I watched the Democratic National Convention and Vice-President candidate Kamala Harris (D) spoke about how much she admired her mother and grandmother. She talked about kids going back to school whether in person or remotely and how important going to school was. She also talked about how challenging it is for parents and teachers during this time. There are so many questions to answer like what happens if I send my child to school and she gets the virus? Or what happens when I begin teaching my face-2-face classes and I catch the virus? As we head into the fall 2020 school year, these are questions that parents and teachers have. 

Everytime Senator Harris spoke I heard family. The importance of family! Mothers! Fathers! Grandmothers! In many households, parents have chosen to homeschool. In other households, the parents have to leave home and their children are either going to school, or sitting in front of a computer screen and learning virtually. No matter which story is ours, we are concerned with keeping our children (and ourselves) safe from coronavirus.

When Senator Harris spoke of her mother, it reminded me of how much my mother supported me throughout my high school, college, grad school career.

Her support meant everything to me, even though (at times) I felt that she was overbearing and too

my mom

strict. When I didn’t understand a school topic, if she couldn’t explain it, she found someone that could. With her guidance, my dad’s, aunts, uncles and grandparents, I am here today able to talk with you about the importance of family support.

As Senator Harris said, getting ready this school year is challenging whether you are the parent or the teacher. But what I know is that our children are counting on us to learn and thrive. We can give them that whether we are college grads or high school dropouts. We may not have all (or even some) of the answers, but let’s start with the three points listed below.

Commit to these things:

  • Your commitment to helping your child get online daily
  • Asking your child questions to help him think critically
  • Taking time to have fun. Play with your child and learn from him/her
  • Be a good listener
  • Be willing to learn new things

Know that this is an usual time, so have lots of teachable moments, fun, and learning something new times! Be patient with yourself, your situation and your children. Make memories that your children will talk about when they grow up. 

 

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons, Fathers and Daughters or Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

August 28, 2020 at 6:08 pm Leave a comment

Hey Mom Lose The Guilt!

Eliminate Mom Guilt

It never surprises me when I ask a question to a mom and her daughter, and they have entirely different thoughts about how a particular experience or conversation turned out. Invariably the daughter may feel that the experience was worse than what her mom thought.

When that happens, mom feels like she has to defend her position. But it’s not the end of the world; just an opportunity to have a deeper understanding of what took place during that experience.

When my daughter was a teen, what I remember thinking was that I was a pretty understanding mom. According to my daughter, I was intolerant (and in her words – scary) 😞.

The good news was that I had a choice. I could modify my behavior so that we could hear and understand each other or I could decide that we just didn’t understand each other and never would. Feeling like a “bad parent” was the bad news.

As a parent, there are lots of uncharted territory, and if you feel guilty every time you do something that backfires, you’ll feel guilty A LOT! Plus your kids will use your guilt against you to get more privileges 😉.

After listening to many stories about challenges and misunderstandings that mothers and daughters face, I began conducting Mother & Daughter Teas. These events are fun, generate laughter, dress up, silly photos, yummy foods, good feelings and authentic conversations.

I conduct them in school settings, ideally on Saturdays (or Sundays after church). If you are interested in how this event can be conducted with your school’s parents reply to this email.

I have a limited number of dates between March and May, so don’t wait!

Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons, Fathers and Daughters or Fathers and their Sons.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Parent Coach, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

January 13, 2020 at 3:06 pm 1 comment

Are You An Invisible Woman?

Have you ever felt like you didn’t matter? Like you were invisible? Earlier this year, I began feeling that I could be easily replaced with someone who was just as fantastic as me, but younger. I began to feel that age mattered. It’s a sad but true fact that so many women over forty feel invisible. Then I read about Deborah Boland and her story.

“One of the things that inspired me to do what I now do, after having had an executive position with a telecom giant, was an experience I had one day following one of my seminars.

An attractive, well dressed woman came up to me and told me that the thing she hated most about becoming older was that she felt invisible. She explained how, everywhere you look, you see woman in their twenties and thirties being presented as role models for beauty and style. Rarely do you see mature women in TV and print ads and some of the fashion magazines feature teenagers as models. There are only a few magazines devoted entirely to the mature woman – More Magazine is one of them.”

Just because we’re getting older doesn’t mean we have to become an invisible part of society. It doesn’t mean that we have to let ourselves go, gain weight and start looking frumpy. My aunt Mary, while in her eighties, looks like she just stepped off the cover of Vogue whenever she goes out.

A woman can still look great as she ages if . . . she learns how to do it. 

Many of the makeup techniques that work on a twenty or thirty-year old, are a disaster on the face of a forty-five year old woman.

Unfortunately, many older women have not yet learned this. As we age, one of the makeup secrets we need to know is that “Less is better.”

Mistakes in wardrobe are even more apparent. Recently, Deborah Boland was asked by a national magazine to comment on some celebrity women. Here’s what she had to say about an outfit that Kim Cattrall was wearing: “Belly bearing cutoffs and lace up top are not for the over forty woman. Longer, boy cut shorts and a fuller cut tank with a built-in bra would give her the same bare look.”

Below are some fashion anchors every woman over forty should have in her wardrobe:

  • A “Little Black Dress”
  • Black/Navy Pencil or A-Line Skirt
  • Black/Navy Slacks/Trousers
  • Black Cashmere Sweater
  • White Shirt
  • Comfortable yet Chic Black 2” heels
  • Classic Trench Coat

Fashion tips: Pants with clean lines, no pockets, no pleats look best on almost every woman because they are slimming.

Black or navy will make you look thinner, but add some color with accessories to give your look some flair. Elastic waist pants or skirts are to be avoided at all costs because they flatter no one.

Develop a signature. Wear a favorite ring or special bracelet all the time. Something people will always identify and remember about you.

The scarf should be a wardrobe staple. Learn how to use it and wear it many ways, such as, looped through your pants as a belt, or tied on the handle of your handbag.

If you want to learn more about Deborah’s insider techniques for looking fabulous after forty, fifty, sixty and beyond, visit: http://www.FabulousAfter40.com

Until next time, keep looking your best and claim your power.

Interested in learning more about yourself as a superwoman? Contact me – Finding Superwoman creator, C. Lynn Williams, to receive information about my inspiring work-life balance programs for corporate and entrepreneurial moms.

C. Lynn Williams, #FindingSuperwoman

Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

December 26, 2018 at 9:25 am Leave a comment

This Was A New Lesson For Me

Have you ever had one of those weeks?

You know, the one where everything goes sideways?

I talk about it in this video blog. Click Here

 

 

 

 

 

Enjoy!

Are you a mom who wants less stress and more enjoyment out of life? Connect

Click Here to become a part of my Balanced Moms Facebook group.

C. Lynn Williams

Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

 

October 20, 2018 at 10:55 pm Leave a comment

The Importance of Setting Boundaries

Has anyone ever stood too close to you in an elevator? How did you feel? It was uncomfortable right?

Not only do I feel a little claustrophobic in a crowded elevator, I also feel that way when tasks start to pile up on me and I allow them! I don’t say NO!  In the past, there were a lot of reasons that kept me from saying NO –  my environment, my upbringing, my willingness to please; all kept me from saying “No I can’t do that for you.” It didn’t matter whether the request was work-related, friends, or family members.

I realized that I did not set boundaries for myself. I would do the task, but be angry about it. I’d say to myself – “I can’t believe they asked me to do this!” It wasn’t until I realized that I was the only one who could control this. The only way I was going to have time to myself, was to allow myself to set boundaries around what I would and would not do.

Depending on your culture, upbringing, or social status, the only time women feel comfortable setting boundaries is when they don’t feel good. Society understands when women are sick and can’t do something as opposed to not wanting to.It’s a big difference between wanting to do something and not having the resources, and not wanting to do something and not knowing how to say no. Setting boundaries is a way of caring for you. 

Just like with any other habit that we begin, start practicing by saying No. Practice setting boundaries on what you’re willing and unwilling to do. Give yourself permission to say no to things that you really don’t want to do. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but just like with any other habit that you practice, you will be surprised at how comfortable you feel and how it begins to relieve the stress and the anxiety that you experience when you take on yet another project that you really don’t have the time or the desire to do.

As entrepreneurs and busy businesswomen, our success is predicated on making wise decisions. Not just making wise decisions for our businesses, but for ourselves as well. Our male counterparts do it every day. How often has your significant other said no to you? It’s just one little task that needed to be done, and he said no? Don’t get mad at him. Just learn to do it more often – for you.  #setboundaries

Interested in learning more about how to control the stresses in your life and maintain balance? Contact me – to receive information about my inspiring coaching programs for working and entrepreneur mothers.

Click Here to become a part of my Finding Superwoman Facebook community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Founder of Finding Superwoman, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

October 20, 2017 at 12:01 pm Leave a comment

5 Tips to Managing Your Time

Have you ever said I’ll do that later, only to find that there were at least 3 more things waiting for you to complete…later? For the next 2 ½ minutes, read this carefully and take notes. I am giving you five free tips for mastering your time management. Truly these tips will transform your chaotic day into a calm experience. For years, I had an issue with time. It’s not that I couldn’t arrive on time; it’s making sure that what I was leaving had been completed. For example, I hate leaving the house with tasks undone like cleaning up the kitchen, putting a load of clothes in the wash or finishing one of my tasks as an entrepreneur.

Here’s the secret. I suffered from that syndrome that many working mothers experience in their everyday lives. Perfectionism! I don’t know about you, but I was taught that having a clean, orderly house was my responsibility. Nobody told me to go out and be successful, and by the way, don’t worry about your house. It’ll take care of itself! I also was not taught how to manage household activities as a successful entrepreneur.  I did learn it and offer it as one of the lessons in my Kick the Chaos coaching program.

Managing your time is a skill that you want to develop into a habit. Being successful in business may mean you won’t have a clean house. Look at your guy friends or your spouse. When they have appointments or meetings, they are out the door. I know this is true for my husband. It doesn’t matter what’s not operating perfectly (or imperfectly in our home), he practices good time management. ALWAYS!

Clearly in business, timeliness is next to godliness and having a reputation that you can’t make it to meetings or events on time can discredit your credibility. If you have children at home, getting them out of the house (on time) can also impact your schedule. You’re ready for success, aren’t you?

Try these simple tips:

  • Set your intention to manage your time today.

 Decide today that you are going to manage your time. I learned a long time ago that thoughts are things and if you want to attract specific      things into your life, you have to change your thoughts. (It works!)

  • Do it now or set a reasonable date for later.

Don’t obsess over what needs to be done. Decide what your most urgent tasks are and do them. If time does not permit this, schedule the tasks on your calendar.

  • Make a list of what you want to complete.

I am a big proponent of creating lists, because my dominant learning style is visual and seeing a picture of my daily to dos, keeps it fresh on my mind. Depending on how urgent they are or how many I have, I schedule them in my phone.

  • Give yourself time to be on time.

I learned this habit before my kids were born. Take your shower and put on your make-up when you first get up in the morning. For health enthusiasts and meditation gurus like me, pray and work out, then take your shower and put on your make-up. I find that giving myself time to be on time, means I have to work smartly.

  • Stop Rushing!

Successful entrepreneurs and business women give themselves time to get to their places of business or meetings. Speeding down the highway and honking your horn before the light turns green is not going to help you make that meeting in a timely fashion. Giving yourself 15 extra minutes allows for unexpected delays.

Become a master by practicing these five time management tips daily. You are on your way to a transformed life.

Imagine what it’s like have great time management and work-life balance!

If you are struggling to make this happen, click Here and schedule a complimentary discovery session with me. Want to be a part of something big? Click Here to join my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, creator of Finding Superwoman™

Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
www.clynnwilliams.com

June 17, 2017 at 5:18 pm Leave a comment

The Problem with Procrastination

Have you ever decided that you were going to complete a task – not a big deal, yet you found yourself thinking about it and thinking about it and thinking about it until the time for you to complete it was over?

I have that problem when it comes to catalogs that come in the mail. I see something I want, but I think about it over and over and over again until it is no longer of interest to me.

That my friend is called PROCRASTINATION!

Procrastination occurs for me when I have a decision to make and I’m not quite sure if I should move forward with it or not. Perhaps procrastination occurs for you too in your business or in personal decisions that you need to make. Let me share a couple of tips with you when you feel like you’re stuck and can’t move forward.

One: If it’s a really big decision, I create a pros and cons sheet. Pros and cons allow me to look at the positives and negatives of moving forward with my decision, and it gives me an opportunity to let my higher spirit weigh in for things I hadn’t considered.

Two: I think about lost opportunity. Lost opportunity is important whether it’s in my business or when it comes to my family. The lost opportunity is what is the consequence for me not moving forward; what do I have to lose if I don’t move forward, and what do I gain by moving forward. You would be surprised at how powerful it is to look at lost opportunity.

Take a moment and think about where you would be if procrastination had not gotten your attention. Some decisions you don’t get to think over and over. Just like some opportunities don’t re-present themselves. Procrastination is just another form of fear, and I urge you to draw a line in the sand and move forward. You have more regrets from something you did not accomplish than something you tried and it did not work.

  • Take a chance!
  • Make a decision.
  • No regrets!

This is your time to shine. Your best days are ahead of you.

Interested in gaining more balance in your life? Contact me – MsParentGuru to receive information about my inspiring parenting and coaching programs.

Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.

C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

May 18, 2017 at 2:24 pm Leave a comment

Consistency: A Recipe for Success

When I think of consistency, I think of smooth cake batter; the kind that my mother turned into delicious cakes when I was a child. Consistency means that each separate ingredient blends together to create a delicious end result.  

As an entrepreneur, we are constantly taking individual items, putting them together and turning them into finished products or services. That’s our goal. But what happens when things don’t come together? Or more importantly, what can we do to ensure consistent consistency?

Let’s go back to my cake analogy. Mom would always ensure that she had all of the ingredients to make her cake. Those ingredients were: eggs, butter, sugar, flour, milk, flavoring, etc. Once she had the ingredients, it was important that she mixed the ingredients together until they were completely blended. Since she was a seasoned baker, she could tell from the consistency of her batter, whether the cake was going to be successful or not. Sometimes she may have lacked every ingredient and had to substitute. Depending on what she had to substitute, would determine if the cake tasted good or not.

Consistency is following a series of behaviors and habits. Think about your last product or service. Did you have everything you needed to offer a consistently excellent product or service? Perhaps you needed to:

  • Determine a need for your product or service
  • Perform research
  • Create and try out a test sample
  • Measure it against your competition
  • Price it competitively

Or maybe it had nothing to do with product or service ingredients, but personal ingredients for success. Maybe your personal recipe for success means that you need to carve out time to eat healthy foods and exercise. Or maybe you are burning the candle at both ends and not getting enough rest. For me that’s always an issue because as an author my inspiration occurs in the wee hours of the morning. However when I prepare for my work-life or family dynamics consultations, I find that I am working late into the evening. We are NOT machines! We are creative beings that make a living based on how consistent we are in our business. It is very difficult to be a boss entrepreneur or corporate woman when you are suffering from fatigue or exhaustion. 

Here are 3 suggestions for creating successful consistency in your business and personal life:

  • Set a Goal – successful consistency is moving forward in a positive way. Setting business and personal goals is one of your ingredients toward consistency. One of my goals is getting in bed by 10:30 pm. Lately I have been going to bed at midnight and getting up at 6 am. But remember my creative writing thoughts occur by 4 – 6 am – so going to bed at midnight stifles my writing creativity. Setting a goal gives me something to work toward.
  • Form a Habit – It’s easy to form a habit. Just do something consistently for 21 days (or 21 times) and the next thing you know, you have formed a habit. Think about forming some positive habits.
    • Join me and start getting more sleep.
    • Start eating healthier instead of grabbing that bag of chips or can of soda because you haven’t eaten all day.

While you are forming some new habits, consider replacing the ones that you no longer need or want. For me, it’s giving myself enough time. As a busy entrepreneur, mom and wife, I always have something to do. If I have a morning appointment, getting on the computer is disastrous, because I can lose track of time and have to rush to my meeting instead of arriving with time to look over my notes. Think about what habit you would like to eliminate.

  • Practice Self-Care – As a woman, we carry the weight of everyone on our shoulders. We worry about our families, our friends, neighbors, our causes. But we seldom take time for ourselves unless we get sick. Being sick seems to be the only thing that gives us permission to slow down and take care of ourselves. Practice a little self-care and take time daily and do one or all of these things for you:
    • Pray or meditate
    • Think about 5 things you are grateful for
    • Eat a high protein breakfast (or drink a protein smoothie)
    • Pick an affirmation and say it to yourself (‘I approve of myself’ or ‘I love myself exactly as I am’)
    • Give someone a compliment just cause
    • Say a prayer of thanks before going to bed

While consistency is the recipe for success, you are the engine to move your success forward. If taking that first step seems challenging, give me a call and let’s talk about it. Click here to schedule

 

C. Lynn Williams’ Bio
C. Lynn Williams is an award-winning author, motivational speaker, educator and business owner. Her passion is helping parents create the kind of home life that welcomes communication and trust with their tweens, teens and adult children. Believing working moms can have better work-life balance, she created Finding Superwoman™ a mentoring program to help women kick the chaos out of their life. Her motto: Providing parenting solutions. Building solid foundations. Securing promising futures.
www.clynnwilliams.com

May 1, 2017 at 10:09 am 1 comment

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