Posts tagged ‘Parent’
Teaching Kids About Money
Guest article by Yulissa Asprilla, yasprilla@annuity.org
Teaching your kids about money is an important part of parenting. It is important to start early and give them a basic understanding of money and how it works. You can also help them to understand the importance of investing and the risks associated with it. Finally, you can help them to understand the importance of giving back to the community and how to make charitable donations, It can help them to become financially responsible adults.
Some parents may not feel confident enough in their own financial knowledge to be able to teach their kids about money. Others may think it is inappropriate to discuss money with young children, or mistakenly believe that children are too young to comprehend financial concepts. However, it is important to remember that teaching your children about money is essential to their development, and it is never too early to start.
When to start?
Depending on the age of your child, the conversation may vary. For younger children, you can start by introducing basic concepts such as the value of money, how to save, and how to make wise spending decisions. As your child gets older, you can introduce more complex topics such as budgeting, investing, and credit. It is important to have open and honest conversations with your child about money and to ensure that they understand the value of money and how to manage it responsibly.
How do I convince my kid that college is worth it?
When it comes to convincing your kid that college is worth it, it is important to emphasize the numerous benefits that come with a college education. Explain to your child that college provides them with the opportunity to gain valuable knowledge and skills that will help them succeed in their future career. Additionally, point out the potential for increased earning potential and job security that a college degree can provide. Finally, explain that college is a great way to make long-lasting connections and friendships that can last a lifetime.
Making a Budget
The first step is to help them create a budget that is realistic and achievable. This should include setting a goal for how much money they want to save each month and listing all of their monthly expenses. Once they have a budget in place, they should be encouraged to stick to it. This means avoiding impulse purchases and shopping around for the best deals. They should also be reminded to save any extra money they have left over at the end of the month. Finally, it is important to provide ongoing support and encouragement to help them stay on track. With these steps, they should be able to stick to their budget and reach their financial goals.
Lessons & Activities
We need to teach them that making mistakes in the comfort of their home, could greatly impact their future decisions by giving a sense of importance coming from the use of money. Researchers from the University of Minnesota suggest focusing “children’s education about money on the concepts of earning, spending, saving, borrowing, and sharing.” The University of Arizona doctoral student Ashley LeBaron said in her studies that “Practice Makes Perfect: Experimental learning as a Method of Financial Socialization.”
Software Applications for Teaching Kids About Money
Miata Edoga, president of the financial education company Abundance Bound, told Parentology, “We don’t want our kids to be afraid of spending, or be afraid of managing credit. We want them to feel confident in their ability to negotiate successful financial lives, to come at money from a place of power, rather than fear.”
The information age ushered in new media teaching platforms and introduced the world to the “digital native.” New educational apps for kids are launched regularly. These technological tools use interactivity and gamification to make financial concepts fun for children and teens, Additionally, by Educating kids about core personal finance topics, these apps simulate the digital-era experience of using credit and debit cards, mobile payment methods, and online banking.
Wish your family just said “Thank You Mom” once in a while? Attend my upcoming webinar where I talk about it.
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C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
Tell Yourself You Are Enough
Telling yourself you are enough is a good start to something better.
Teaching Responsibility versus Perfection
This month I’ve focused on commitment and responsibility within our families, with ourselves as parents, and with our children.
I would not be MsParentguru, if I didn’t mention that many of us grew up with parents who taught us that success meant you did things exactly as you were told – perfectly.
That’s how I was raised.
Thinking back to my childhood, my siblings and I had chores. To deviate from my parent’s expectations was not good! There were consequences. 😩 For example, during the week, I was expected to heat up dinner, by the time my parents got home from work. My sister or brother would set the table.
Being the strong-willed child who stretched the limits of what my mom wanted me to do, I would not focus so much on having dinner ready, I would do something that I thought would make mom happy and proud of me.
Why? 🤷🏽♀️ Kids need the why…
Of course she reprimanded me because I did not do what she expected me to do, but what I felt as a child, was that I couldn’t please my mother.
How many times have you felt like that growing up? If you did exactly what your parents asked you to do they still weren’t pleased with the results? So we have children that suffer with self-esteem issues and I wonder if parents are requiring perfection as a need for control instead of teaching children the bigger picture?
The bigger picture is that there are many ways to complete tasks at home, at school or at work. When we get stuck with how something should be done, it causes issues in our relationship with our kids.
So how do we repair those relationships?
One way is to be really clear about what it is that we want our children to do when we assign tasks or chores – simply saying “clean up your room” could mean that there are no dirty clothes or plates of food underneath the bed or stuffed in the closet.
It might mean that your bed is made and whatever else you want them to do in their room. Once you have explained the task, have your child say back to you what it is that they heard you say so that both of you understand. I certainly remember saying “that’s not what I asked you to do”, and hearing – “Mom that’s what you said.”
Will this strategy work the first couple of times maybe so, maybe not. However, as you work on communicating in a way that they understand and cover it with a lot of love and grace, conversations, and the expectations will get better and better. I’d love to hear your thoughts on what it meant to be a perfect, parent and issues that you may have faced trying to control your child’s responses.
What was missing between my mom and I, was the explanation for why what I did was not good enough. These types of conversations help parents teach responsibility and life lessons to their children without squelching their self-esteem.
If your motherhood journey feels more like a chore, than an honored responsibility…Register here for my FREE 3-Day challenge: Make Family Living Easier.
C. Lynn Williams, Ms. Parentguru
Parenting Skills All Moms Need
How many times have you thought that your kids were the worst kids in the neighborhood, but you weren’t sure how to make them more well behaved? 🤔
Reading the news and watching people with their children, I wonder what kind of discussions take place at home. For example, you tell your child “Clean up your room”. You walk by his room an hour later, and not only is it not cleaned up, but he’s also playing a video game.
What do you do?
1. Yell at your child
2. Ignore them
3. Institute consequences
I love instituting consequences because it teaches your child life lessons. The life lesson is that people like dealing with well-mannered people. So, as adorable as your child is (to you), when they mis-behave no one likes them, including you. 🤷🏽♀️
Did you know, the older your child is, the harder it is to teach them manners and good behavior. They are difficult to deal with at school and in public. Then they become the teacher’s problem, or a statistic with law enforcement.
If you ask your child to do something and it’s not done – how do you hold them accountable?
If you don’t hold them accountable, what are the consequences to you and your child?
How do they learn the lesson that you’re trying to teach them?
If you are having a difficult time holding your child accountable, it might seem easier to expect your child’s teacher or another adult to take responsibility for parenting your child. It sends mixed messages to a child when someone else outside of you or your spouse becomes the responsible parent your child. Because that’s what happens when law-enforcement gets involved or the teacher has to discipline your child at school. Instead start when your child is very young, giving consequences that are appropriate for them at their age.
For example, before naptime, show your child how to pick up their toys and put them in the toy box. They cannot take a nap until the toys are in the toybox. My mom used to do that with us. What’s crazy is that I hated taking naps, 😴 so I can’t believe that I was duped into cleaning up my room before I laid down to take a nap that I didn’t want.
But it worked!
If you start when they’re 2-3 years old, by the time they are 5, 6, or 7, they are pretty well mannered.
The other thing about discipline and consistency is that it doesn’t work (as well) if you are not giving your child your attention on a regular basis. If the only time you interact with your child is to discipline, yell or scream at them, then you have lost their attention (and respect) when you want them to be well mannered and obedient.
Let me know how instituting consequences works for you and your child. If you need help, click on the link and let’s talk:
Want to learn more about how to get along with your family members?
Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and Sons, Fathers and Daughters or Fathers and Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
What Do I Need to Do To Get Your Attention❓
What’s one of the first things you do when you get a moment to yourself? You probably pull out your phone. 📱
There’s so much you can do on your phone. You can have a whole conversation by text or talking. You can play a game, shop or watch one of your favorite shows.
However, when you’re raising children, there’s so much of you that’s required for them to grow up healthy: physically, mentally, and emotionally. Most important is to know what’s going on in their heads.
I was talking to one of my friends about their kids who are under the age of 5. We all agreed that if your child was awake and the house was quiet 🤫, they were probably getting into something! You had to watch them constantly!
As our kids get older, we feel that we don’t have to watch them as closely and assume that things are okay with them. If they weren’t, our kids would tell us. Natural assumption right?
Wrong!
In families today, our children are relying on us to put aside our devices and initiate discussions; listen to what’s going on with them. It’s not easy….
Your teen will talk. They have to be assured that you’re listening and won’t judge them. There can’t be any topic that you won’t discuss with them. Are you willing to talk about anything and everything? Can you listen without letting your facial expressions show how horrified you are with the conversation? 😫🤯
We are living in times where anything is possible and are kids want to explore, try out new and different theories, relationships and experiences. Being able to share their thoughts and concerns with you, helps them put them in perspective. Keeping the lines of communication open, by relating to your child’s thoughts and feelings; asking them what they think – makes all the difference in the world.
Have a meal together; it doesn’t matter which one. First require that all phones and tablets be put away. 2nd requirement: allow your child the freedom to say whatever is on their mind (must be respectful). Ask “Tell me what’s going on”. The first several conversations may be awkward while your kids try to figure out if you’re being honest and whether they can say what they feel. 🤷🏽♀️
Every time I hear or read about another mass shooting; I wonder who the shooter had to talk to within his family. If they shot or killed a family member before taking other lives, I wonder what kind of dysfunction was taking place. Were they able to share the fact that they were being bullied or that they were feeling anti-social? Were they abused? Are they suffering from a mental illness that went unaddressed?
I realize these are simple questions for complex issues. But what I do know is that young people have lots of challenges going on in their lives these days. We as parents can’t solve them all. However, being watchful, following your intuition (if you feel something is wrong, it is) and making it safe to tell you what’s going on, goes a long way to minimize issues that cause our kids to self-harm or harm others. Peace.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parent coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mother and Daughter drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
How to Boost Your Confidence to the Max
When you exude confidence and you’re comfortable in your own skin, the world becomes a better place, and you attract positivity. During times of stress, your mental and physical health can take a nosedive, and it affects your outlook on everything. There are many steps you can take to get your motivation back on track so that you can look and feel your best. Guest blog by Gwen Payne from invisiblemoms.com.
Ways to Look and Feel Good
Sign up for a family photoshoot
Family photoshoots can inject a lot of fun into your life and give you an opportunity to connect with your loved ones. For the photoshoot, you can dress up and make an effort, which can help make you feel positive about your appearance. A skilled photographer will capture you and your family in the best light, making everyone look and feel good.
Improve your nutrition
Both sugar and caffeine give you an instant boost of energy, but too much can make your body crash and become fatigued. Too many additives, sugar, and processed foods can lead to weight gain. Improving your overall nutrition with a balanced diet can help clear brain fog and give you more body confidence.
Improve your living space
When your house is cluttered, disorganized and messy, it can feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. And most likely, you never want anyone to visit. If you love to entertain, this is likely holding you back from spending time with friends and family. Fortunately, you can easily reverse this! Spend a few weekends clearing out everything, cleaning and reorganizing your space. Next, open the shades, light some scented candles and add some new decor, and your home will be primed for maximum positivity.
Set goals
Set future goals and hold yourself accountable. When setting goals it’s important to make them challenging but achievable by breaking a big goal down into short and long-term goals. Draw up a step-by-step plan to achieve your goal, and then break it down into daily tasks. If you don’t achieve your daily or monthly goal, do better the next month.
A good goal is to go after career and academic goals. For example, if you’ve always wanted to get your master’s degree, enroll in an online program to start. An MBA program can increase your business knowledge in areas such as strategic planning and leadership, and enhance your self-awareness and self-assessment abilities.
Monthly pamper sessions
Don’t feel guilty about indulging in some pampering, as these can be great for detoxing, circulation, and creating a sense of calm. Whether it’s a sports massage or spa treatment, these moments can really make you feel good about yourself.
Pursue a childhood hobby
Get in touch with your child-like spirit by pursuing a hobby you enjoyed as a child. Loved roller skating? Buy a pair of skates! Enjoyed dancing and gymnastics? Sign-up for online dance classes. You don’t have to be the best at it — just do something you enjoy.
Outdoor activities
Nature has the power to rejuvenate both mind and body. Take up an outdoor sport like running, walking, hiking, biking, or watersports, to enjoy the healing effect of nature and the rush of endorphins. Treat yourself to new gear when you take up an outdoor sport. Track your progress by investing in a fitness watch where you can download apps to map out new routes and monitor your efforts in real-time.
Take Steps to Feel Good
If you’re stuck in a rut, you’ll have to make a conscious effort to change. The most important thing is sticking to a game plan and making one small change at first.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my parenting coaching programs that help guide you through Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters drama, Mothers and their Sons challenges, Fathers and Daughters as well as Fathers and their Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
Relinquishing Control Releases Stress
It’s the wee hours of the morning, as I lay here trying to go back to sleep, a car sits outside beeping it’s horn for whomever is supposed to come out. I want to yell at that person to stop 🛑 waking up everyone while he tries to get his passenger. 🤬
The question at the moment is, can I do anything about the beeping horn? Am I going to lose more sleep 😴 or can I refocus on something else?
2021 taught me three things:
• There are things I can’t change like: when COVID ends, how to make an adult act differently, etc.
• Remember who I am and be true to myself
• Focus on what is working instead of what isn’t
The common denominator here was that I focused a lot on controlling events, relationships and my feelings. When I chose to live through each experience, I discovered the best parts of it and moved on, I was happier.
I learned in 2021 that when it comes to peace of mind, control is overrated‼️
Are you thinking about those Aha” moments you experienced?
Or maybe like me, you’ve had enough experiences occur that have left you worn out‼️ As my friends at Unity School of Christianity say – “Give life the light touch”
How are you ending 2021? 🤔💬
Wishing you and your family lots of love and a happy and prosperous new year. 😘 🌚🎉🧧
Thanks for reading my blog, and following me on Instagram, Twitter & TikTok @MsParentguru.
C. Lynn Williams
We Can Save Our Boys
It’s hard to advocate for equality and fairness from others, when our sons kill each other. Beefs, challenges, gang wars, whatever… it takes superhuman strength to change the heart and action of young men once the streets have become their parents.
Offer them love, support, structure and discipline while they are young. Continue it through their adolescent and teen years. Teach them to be good people, so they will grow up and be great adults
Be willing to move them out of dangerous communities and away from dangerous people. When I was growing up, an unruly young man was sent to the Army or military school.
If you are a single mom and your son’s dad is not in his life, find a good role model that will provide male support and discipline. Let’s start repeating affirmations of peace, freedom and love over ourselves and our sons. Instead of sending your son out to play, go outside and play with him. I coach parents, and one of my parents said her son has no one to play with outside, because the other kids are afraid of getting shot. That’s a sad commentary on some of our communities now. We can do better.
Our current circumstances do not define who we are, or who our sons are.
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting coaching programs that help you through Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons, Fathers and Daughters and Fathers and their Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams @MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
What Babies Mean When They Cry
We were flying to Charleston, SC and there were lots of families on the flight with babies or young children. Two toddlers got my complete attention because of how intense and long their cries were. Both were toddler boys and the one on the airplane cried for about 30-45 minutes – probably because his ears were popping as we descended. I felt so sorry for him and his mom.
The other little boy was strapped in a stroller (at the airport) and none of his “kin” would take him out and soothe him. He was miserable!
I ❤️ watching children and their parents interact just because… Kids make parents earn their parent wings everyday because they are so unpredictable. Yet if you are in tune with your baby or very young child, you will be able to interpret what their crying means.
Since babies and often young children can’t communicate in words we understand, their crying means different things at different times. A baby may cry if she’s too hot or cold, if she’s lonely, if she needs a change of scenery and wants to move around, or if she just needs to “let it all out.”
I suspect if the child in the airplane had been allowed to walk up and down the aisle, he would have settled down.
Here are several reasons that babies cry:
• I’m hungry –
Listen for: A low-pitched, rhythmic, repetitive cry, combined with other signals such as rooting for the breast, a sucking motion with her tongue, lip-smacking, or putting her fingers into her mouth.
My grandson does this and my daughter says to him “Oh you’re hungry huh?” They understand each other perfectly.
• I’m tired or uncomfortable –
Listen for: A whiny, nasal, continuous cry that builds in intensity is usually baby’s signal that she’s had enough (as in, “Nap, please!” — usually accompanied by yawns, eye-rubs or ear-tugs) or is otherwise uncomfortable (“I need a clean diaper” or “I can’t get comfortable in this car seat”).
You will notice this in malls where Mom has been shopping and forgotten that her baby is on a schedule. The baby starts with a mild cry that builds in intensity. “Hurry up and take care of me Mom!”
• I’ve had enough –
Listen for: Get ready for a fussy, whiny cry. She may try to turn her head or body away from over stimulating sights or sounds.
This is a good time to change sceneries. If you are in a noisy place, move to a quieter area and rock the baby until he settles down.
This also happens when your baby or toddler is beyond tired. They are fighting sleep. You will have to settle them down, so that they can fall asleep.
Rub their back, say soothing things, or play relaxing music. There is a wonderful app by Calm that plays all kinds of music to help babies through adults relax.
• I’m bored –
Listen for: This cry starts out as coos (as baby tries to get a good interaction going), then turns into fussing (when the attention she’s craving isn’t coming), then builds to bursts of indignant crying (“Why are you ignoring me?”), alternating with whimpers (“C’mon, what’s a baby got to do to get a cuddle around here?”).
This is easy. Pick your child up; engage them; laugh and talk to them. It makes me crazy when people say “You spoil your child when you pick them up.” I guess at some point, you can spoil your child, but pick them up, talk and play with them, so that they are emotionally secure. 
The power of touch and engagement is really important to a child’s emotional growth, self esteem and sense of security.
Go have fun with your child!
Interested in learning more about your family’s dynamics? Contact me – Ms. Parent Guru to receive information about my inspiring parenting programs for Aging Parents, Mothers and Daughters, Mothers and their Sons, Fathers and Daughters or Fathers and their Sons.
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
This Was A New Lesson For Me
Have you ever had one of those weeks?
You know, the one where everything goes sideways?
I talk about it in this video blog. Click Here
Enjoy!
Are you a mom who wants less stress and more enjoyment out of life? Connect
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C. Lynn Williams
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
Staying Sane While Raising Your Teens 
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