Posts tagged ‘relationships’
Navigating the Mother-Son Relationship: Building Bonds
The mother-son relationship is a unique bond that significantly impacts both individuals. While nurturing is essential, encouraging independence and setting boundaries is crucial for healthy development. Mothers must avoid over-nurturing to prevent raising dependent sons. The author offers strategies in her book to cultivate balanced, respectful relationships that foster emotional intelligence and responsibility.
Continue Reading October 10, 2024 at 8:12 pm Leave a comment
Teaching Children to Express Emotions Healthily: 3 Tips…
Creating a safe and open environment is the first step in helping children express their emotions healthily. When children feel understood and supported, they are more likely to share their feelings openly and confidently.
Building Emotional Strength: A Guide for Parents Navigating Anxiety With Their Children
Guest blog provided by Gwen Payne.
When it comes to fostering an emotionally healthy home environment, understanding the profound impact that parental anxiety can have on children is crucial. As parents, this is the first step towards nurturing their resilience and emotional strength. Creating a supportive atmosphere where children can navigate their feelings of anxiety confidently is essential. Today, C. Lynn Williams will delve into several effective strategies designed to help parents recognize signs of anxiety in their children, as well as manage their own stress in ways that promote a positive emotional climate for the entire family.
Signs of Anxiety in Your Child
Vigilance is key in identifying anxiety in children, who may exhibit changes in behavior, mood swings, or physical symptoms such as stomach aches or headaches. By paying close attention to how your child acts in different settings, you can catch early signs of distress. It’s important to approach these signs with openness and without judgment, creating a supportive environment for your child to share their feelings.
Encouraging Open Communication
Creating an environment of open communication and trust is pivotal for supporting your child through moments of anxiety. Strive to make your home a place where your child feels safe discussing their fears and concerns. Active listening and validating their feelings convey understanding and respect, encouraging them to express their worries freely and openly.
Reduce Work Stress
If your current job is causing you anxiety, maybe it’s time to explore how boosting your education could expand your career options. Pursuing online educational opportunities – especially focusing on flexible nurse practitioner programs – could be a great way to earn your online FNP degree. This mode of education not only offers flexibility to manage your caregiving responsibilities but also opens doors to various high-demand fields such as nurse education, informatics, nurse administration, and advanced practice nursing. By tailoring your learning journey to your personal and professional needs, you can alleviate work-related stress and position yourself for a fulfilling career in healthcare, all from the comfort of your home.
Help Children With Coping Skills
Teach your child coping mechanisms and problem-solving skills to handle anxiety-inducing situations with confidence. Introducing strategies such as deep breathing, identifying triggers, and simplifying complex tasks can empower your child. Encouraging them to approach challenges with a problem-solving attitude builds resilience and self-assurance, key components of emotional strength.
Assess & Manage Parental Anxiety
Take time to reflect on your personal anxiety levels and how they might affect your parenting style. Recognizing how your responses to stress can impact your child’s emotional health promotes a thoughtful approach to managing emotions. This self-awareness is essential for reducing the transmission of anxiety to your child and promoting a serene and supportive home atmosphere. By engaging in this introspective process, you can cultivate a healthier dynamic and better support your child’s emotional development.
Prioritizing Parental Self-Care
Self-care is fundamental to effectively managing your anxiety and supporting your child emotionally. Regular exercise, mindfulness practices, and dedicating time to activities you enjoy can drastically enhance your emotional well-being. By making self-care a priority, you ensure that you are emotionally available and supportive of your child’s needs.
Seeking Professional Guidance
If you observe persistent signs of distress in your child, seeking help from mental health professionals may be beneficial. Therapy or counseling can provide both you and your child with strategies to manage anxiety and improve emotional well-being. Professional guidance can be invaluable in navigating the complexities of family anxiety dynamics.
Successfully navigating anxiety with your children involves recognizing their signs of distress, managing your own anxiety, and creating a supportive family environment. Key to this process is open communication, teaching effective coping strategies, and leading by example through healthy stress management practices. By adopting these approaches, you lay the foundation for a resilient and emotionally strong family. Your proactive and aware efforts in managing anxiety can profoundly influence your child’s capacity to thrive emotionally, fostering a sense of confidence and resilience in facing life’s challenges.
C. Lynn Williams is an author, speaker, educator, and parenting coach. Questions? Please email clynn@clynnwilliams.com.
Does Parenthood Mean You Can’t Be Romantic?
As a parent, finding time to nurture your relationship can sometimes feel like a daunting task.
Continue Reading February 14, 2024 at 6:15 pm Leave a comment
Fathers Need A Village Too
As a young girl, my dad was present in my life. Daily. He brought levity to my life because he told corny jokes and made us laugh. 🃏😁
Neither of my parents talked a lot, but my dad said the least. Which meant when he spoke, his words carried a lot of weight.
He had a group of men he communicated with often – his village. His brother, Gerald (OG Jr), his father, OG Sr, uncles, and his two buddies – Clarence and Ike.
I loved my father and the male perspective he brought to my life. While mom was straight forward and no nonsense, dad was more reflective and gentler. Sort of… He could be brutally frank as well. 😩
During my teen years, my parents divorced and we saw less of my dad.
Years later, I talked with him about his absences. He said “he didn’t have anything to give us financially”. It took my college years for me to realize that my dad was human and had faults. While he had a village, talking easily was not part of his culture, nor was asking for help.
Of course once I became an adult, he was an open book . 🤷🏽♀️
Being a parent is hard and exhausting while amazing at the same time.
While my father was a major influence in my life, so was my grandfather, uncles, and later, father-in-laws, coaches and mentors.
Thank you to the men who have raised or are raising or helping raise children. 🖤🤎🤍 Thank you for being kind and generous in your praise and limiting your criticism.
FATHER’S DAY PRAYER
God, bless all the fathers in the world. Guide them to be good role models and loving to all their children.
Help them to be a father like You are. Give them grace and patience to handle situations in a loving way. Amen!
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C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Parent Coach, Author & Speaker
What Are the Rules?
I’m old enough to remember that rules were made for a reason and people followed them.
Sometimes we broke the rules by disobeying our parents, but not often because there were consequences.
We didn’t do things like throw paper or bags of food on the ground. We didn’t see our parents do it and there were fines if you got caught littering. Plus our parents or someone else gave us a hard time if we disobeyed “the rules”.
I think about how annoying some rules are and what their purpose is.
I love my freedom. So following the rules isn’t always easy for me. But I understand how important they are if I want to live harmoniously with people in my community and in my family.
Freedoms across the world are important too! So I stand in solidarity with my brothers and sisters, when we celebrate events like May Day, Cinco de Mayo and Juneteenth. I watch events in my community and around the world as rebellions reflect how unhappy people are with rules! Yet, without basic rules of conduct, civility and how we live, there is only chaos, not freedom.
I think about the importance of moms in our life. Mothers teach us and help us follow rules and they create customs that follow us for the rest of our lives.
It’s important for parents to share their values with their children, so they understand how they fit into the world and how to live harmoniously with others. The world is a better place when we respect each other and follow basic rules. Our kids are watching us.
By the way, it bugs me when people drive through the red light, don’t stop at stop signs, or beep at pedestrians because they are taking too long to cross the street. 😡
Let’s remember to live harmoniously and that we are all related as humans.
Smile at someone today.
Be courteous.
Let someone merge in front of you when you’re driving. Be a positive role model to your child. That’s my prayer for the month of May.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Author & parent coach
Want to Improve Your Relationship with Your Mother (Daughter)?
Ones of the ways to improve a relationship is to apologize and listen…
Continue Reading February 15, 2023 at 3:21 pm Leave a comment
Teaching Responsibility versus Perfection
This month I’ve focused on commitment and responsibility within our families, with ourselves as parents, and with our children.
I would not be MsParentguru, if I didn’t mention that many of us grew up with parents who taught us that success meant you did things exactly as you were told – perfectly.
That’s how I was raised.
Thinking back to my childhood, my siblings and I had chores. To deviate from my parent’s expectations was not good! There were consequences. 😩 For example, during the week, I was expected to heat up dinner, by the time my parents got home from work. My sister or brother would set the table.
Being the strong-willed child who stretched the limits of what my mom wanted me to do, I would not focus so much on having dinner ready, I would do something that I thought would make mom happy and proud of me.
Why? 🤷🏽♀️ Kids need the why…
Of course she reprimanded me because I did not do what she expected me to do, but what I felt as a child, was that I couldn’t please my mother.
How many times have you felt like that growing up? If you did exactly what your parents asked you to do they still weren’t pleased with the results? So we have children that suffer with self-esteem issues and I wonder if parents are requiring perfection as a need for control instead of teaching children the bigger picture?
The bigger picture is that there are many ways to complete tasks at home, at school or at work. When we get stuck with how something should be done, it causes issues in our relationship with our kids.
So how do we repair those relationships?
One way is to be really clear about what it is that we want our children to do when we assign tasks or chores – simply saying “clean up your room” could mean that there are no dirty clothes or plates of food underneath the bed or stuffed in the closet.
It might mean that your bed is made and whatever else you want them to do in their room. Once you have explained the task, have your child say back to you what it is that they heard you say so that both of you understand. I certainly remember saying “that’s not what I asked you to do”, and hearing – “Mom that’s what you said.”
Will this strategy work the first couple of times maybe so, maybe not. However, as you work on communicating in a way that they understand and cover it with a lot of love and grace, conversations, and the expectations will get better and better. I’d love to hear your thoughts on what it meant to be a perfect, parent and issues that you may have faced trying to control your child’s responses.
What was missing between my mom and I, was the explanation for why what I did was not good enough. These types of conversations help parents teach responsibility and life lessons to their children without squelching their self-esteem.
If your motherhood journey feels more like a chore, than an honored responsibility…Register here for my FREE 3-Day challenge: Make Family Living Easier.
C. Lynn Williams, Ms. Parentguru
Care Enough To Join Me
We had an event in my community yesterday and it had been a culmination of twice weekly activities over a six week period, that included young people from elementary through high school as well as adults.
We had a pretty decent turnout, with most parents attending with their child. The odd thing was that the parents of one of our teens did not attend. She said they were home cleaning house 🧼 🧽. I was really bummed out, for her. She had had some rough times during our weekly meetings with family issues but during the entire time, we never met her parents. 👁👁
It took me back to the days when my children were younger. We tried to attend everything they were involved in. Of course that wasn’t possible, but we tried. And maybe this was true for my teen’s parents. Maybe they attend every other event and just couldn’t with this one. Watching her during our project meetings I got a different impression. To me she felt lonely and alone.
So this is what I want to say to her parents: It is important to show up in your kid’s life as often as you can. Doesn’t matter if they are 5, 15 or 25 years old. Our kids love our support! Yes it’s easy to show up for the large events like graduations and milestone birthdays. But sometimes we have to be parents no matter how busy our days are and be available! That means we play games with our kids, we go for walks (yea put down the headphones, game controllers and phones) 😁
As the parental unit (one of my daughter’s favorite phrases), our kids won’t remember that we were trying to make a living and had to put food on the table that’s not the first thing that they will remember about us. What they may remember is that we sat on the stairs and talked with them about what the 2020 election means; they’ll remember that we drove to the lakefront and watched the sunset; that we talked into the night about good and bad decisions, that we watch their favorite Disney movie 10 times… in a row. They will remember playing Monopoly with you and how many properties you bought!
Your child will remember the times you spent doing stuff together!
I feel bad because my teen friend looks and feels lonely. It doesn’t feel like she has a good support system and I hope she has a stronger one in the future.
Oh and parents… try to be more mindful of the time your child really needs with you.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Summer’s Almost Over – Are You Where You Want to Be?
Have you ever stopped for a moment and thought about some of the things that you’ve accomplished? If your answer is no I completely understand. Usually that’s me too! I am so busy creating and accomplishing, that I don’t think about my achievements. However today is August 1 and the summer is coming to an end. I started thinking about what I’ve accomplished this summer and what it means to me.
I am super passionate about great relationships between parents and their children and have written several books about how achieve the relationship that you want with your children and your parents. This summer I’ve been writing a relationship book about fathers and daughters. While I’ve had some tears, I’ve had some laughter too as I think about my dad and my relationship with him.
You see, I grew up in the 60s, where adults could tell you what to do and you did it. That was a time where your village existed within the neighborhood you lived in, and you had more than one set of parents because every adult could tell you what to do. Parenting then was very different from what’s taking place today – the safety of the villages has all but disappeared.
But back to my father-daughter book. I didn’t think I had a lot to write about my relationship with my dad, until I began writing. His parenting style was quite a bit different from my mother’s and equally important for my growth into womanhood. Dad didn’t sugarcoat what he said, and I knew I could trust him. He was like most dads who don’t provide frills and flowery words to us, but they say what we (daughters) need to hear. 
I can’t wait until my book is ready to share with you. As a matter fact, I will be hosting a father – daughter discussion on August 6 from 7 to 9 PM here in Chicago. Here is the link if you want to attend this free discussion: daddaughtertalk.eventbrite.com. I would love for you to join me. #FathersandDaughtersRock
So… Are you where you want to be?
Click Here to become a part of my parenting community.
C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru
Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker
Staying Sane While Raising Your Teens 
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