Wicked Stepmoms Unite

February 1, 2016 at 3:35 pm Leave a comment

I don’t think of myself as a stepmom, except when all of our kids are home to visit, or most recently to gather for my dad’s memorial service. While I am mother to children that I did physically have, I’d like to think that I am far from wicked.

Two events caused me to thinkof stepmoms   and “wicked” in the same sentence. The first was a conversation I’ve been having with one of my students about her stepmother and how controlling she is, and the other is a relative’s belief that stepchildren don’t have the same attachments to family members as our biological children, therefore they are not entitled to be part of the ‘inner family circle’.

I say hogwash! We stepmoms / blended family moms have a responsibility to keep our children close to us and keep the distinctions to a minimum. 

I know it’s easy to write this and hard to live it, but I know what it’s like to be seen as ‘different’ from the other children. So when we favor our biological children over our stepchildren, or allow others to show favoritism between our kids, we begin to create scars that last well into adulthood. If you feel insecure when your husband wants to spend time with his daughter (your stepdaughter), seek out a therapist, become a part of a supportive stepmoms support group or join my upcoming coaching program for mothers.

Happy, secure mothers are well loved and a joy to be around. Let’s remove “wicked” from our family’s vocabulary.  

 

C. Lynn Williams

#MsParentguru

http://www.clynnwilliams.com

Entry filed under: blended family, daughter, fathers. Tags: , , , , .

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