Staying Sane While Raising Your Teens

Which One Are You Today?

January 4, 2019 at 10:14 pm 5 comments

It’s funny when your kids are small, you don’t ever want them to grow up. They are so innocent and precious and they listen to our every word. Then the day comes when they start saying things like “I’m grown, I can make my own decisions.” And you realize they are growing up and maybe you should let them (make their decisions). 

Then they change back into a non-adult! They say things like:

• Can you pay for my phone?
• Will you complete my FAFSA?
• Do you have money for me to get my nails done?
• Can you pay my car insurance?
• Will you pay my rent?

Wait a minute!

• I thought you were an adult?
• Isn’t that what you told me you were?
• What happened to “I can do this? Please stop telling me what to do!?”

This is the brain of our teenage or twenty-something kid. The problem is that they really don’t want a lessons learned talk, they kinda want to figure it out, but don’t mind asking for your money and support.

My feeling is that when your kid says, “I can do it”, it’s important to let him or her do it. I believe today’s parents don’t want their children to make the mistakes that they made. It sounds good, but isn’t realistic. Growing up means you make mistakes. I made them? You did too. It’s okay. 

Young people today don’t mind making mistakes. They don’t want to be nagged or guilt tripped, but they also want to be rescued when they’ve made a mistake. It’s doesn’t work both ways! Some lessons can only be learned through experience. A daughter who has a child without the security of marriage (against the advice of her parents), takes a risk that she will raise her child alone. A son who wants to play pro ball and decides not to go to college, takes a risk of having an injury (that keeps him from playing) and working the rest of his life as a laborer.

It’s hard watching our children make mistakes especially ones that can follow them for life. It’s harder when they tell you to butt out – let them live their life. Those are hard lessons for us as parents. However, just like our parents had to let us go and grow… we have to do the same thing. A little lesson learning never hurt anybody! Happy 2019!

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C. Lynn Williams, #MsParentguru

Family Dynamics Strategist, Author & Speaker

www.clynnwilliams.com

Entry filed under: #FindingSuperwoman, #lessonslearned, #MsParentguru, #StaySane, adolescents, adult daughters, adult sons, boys, daughter, entitlement, family, father, girls, hormones, Parenting, teenager, teens, tweens, twentysomething. Tags: corporate mom, entrepreneur mom, momlife, moms, mothers, working Moms.